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Understanding Engineers - Take Five

What is the difference between Mechanical Engineers and Civil
Engineers?

Mechanical Engineers build weapons, Civil Engineers build targets.

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Understanding Engineers - Take Six

Three engineering students were gathered together discussing the
possible
designers of the human body.

One said, "It was a mechanical engineer. Just look at all the
joints."

Another said, "No, it was an electrical engineer. The nervous
system has many
thousands of electrical connections."

The last said, "Actually it was a civil engineer. Who else would
run a toxic
waste pipeline through a recreational area?"

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Understanding Engineers - Take Seven

"Normal people believe that if it isn't broke, don't fix it.

Engineers believe that if it isn't broke, it doesn't have enough
features
yet.

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Understanding Engineers - Take Eight

An architect, an artist and an engineer were discussing whether it
was better
to spend time with the wife or a mistress.

The architect said he enjoyed time with his wife, building a solid
foundation
for an enduring relationship.

The artist said he enjoyed time with his mistress, because of the
passion and
mystery he found there.

The engineer said, "I like both."

"Both?"

Engineer: "Yeah. If you have a wife and a mistress, they will
each assume
you are spending time with the other woman, and you can go to the
lab and get
some work done."

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Understanding Engineers - Take Nine

An engineer was crossing a road one day when a frog called out to
him and
said, "If you kiss me, I'll turn into a beautiful princess".

He bent over, picked up the frog and put it in his pocket.

The frog spoke up again and said, "If you kiss me and turn me back
into a
beautiful princess, I will stay with you for one week."

The engineer took the frog out of his pocket, smiled at it and
returned it to
the pocket.

The frog then cried out, "If you kiss me and turn me back into a
princess,
I'll stay with you and do ANYTHING you want."

Again the engineer took the frog out, smiled at it and put it back
into his
pocket.

Finally, the frog asked, "What is the matter? I've told you I'm a
beautiful
princess, that I'll stay with you for a week and do anything you
want. Why
won't you kiss me?"

The engineer said, "Look I'm an engineer. I don't have time for a
girlfriend, but a talking frog, now that's cool."


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