ThoughtnHumor4u : Messages : 462-491 of 5542

'Thought & Humor'
...by Dr. Howdy" - 6 new articles

Three Little Pigs

Q: Why did the three little pigs leave home?

A: Their father was an awful boar.

� Email to a friend �

New Home Construction
UNC Style

Two UNC* grads were working on a house. The one who
was nailing down siding, would reach into his nail pouch,
pull out a nail and either toss it over his shoulder or nail
it in.

The other grad, figuring this was worth looking into, asked,
"Why are you throwing those nails away?"

The first explained, "If I pull a nail out of my pouch and it's
pointed toward me I throw it away because it's defective.
If it's pointed toward the house I nail it in!"

The second got completely upset and yelled, "You moron!
The nails pointed toward you aren't defective! They're
for the other side of the house!"

*Please see "comments" for additional information...

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Nailing Your Colors

http://www.geocities.com/Area51/Shire/6423/Ships/1812.jpg

You may not remember much from your World History class,
but you probably at least remember that the nations of Europe
fought it out for a long time to see who was going to be Number
One. For many years, their biggest way to fight it out was with
their big navies. So, if a ship from England saw a ship from France,
you could expect some fireworks. Of course, the way you knew
what country a ship was from was that flag they flew from the
top of the mast - their colors. When they would see a ship approaching
on the horizon, they usually lowered their colors until they could
see whether that other guy was a friend or an enemy. But occasionally
there was a ship that approached those encounters in a radically
different way. There were a few courageous captains who would
give a simple six-word order to their crew, "Nail our colors to the
mast!" But you could just hear the first mate saying, "Captain, that
means we can't lower our colors, no matter what." To which the
captain would say something like this - "That's right."

HEAR!!!

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Our Blog Readers Snapshot

Num	Perc.	Country Name
27	29.03%	United States
11	11.83%	India
10	10.75%	Unknown	-
8	8.60%	Australia
8	8.60%	Canada
7	7.53%	Germany
4	4.30%	Korea, Republic Of
3	3.23%	Sri Lanka
3	3.23%	Switzerland
2	2.15%	Sweden
2	2.15%	United Kingdom
2	2.15%	Bosnia & Herzegovina
2	2.15%	Malaysia
1	1.08%	Hungary
1	1.08%	South Africa
1	1.08%	Luxembourg
1	1.08%	Romania

Above numbers give a snapshot of the locations
of our last 100 readers around 7 A.M. today.
This will change completely in the next few
minutes. Updates are posted in "comments"
as the day progresses. 'Thought & Humor'
has been read in ALL 230 countries of the
world. A numerical counter is shown way
below...

� Email to a friend �

Water.com

� Email to a friend �

from "'Thought & Humor'
...by Dr. Howdy"

Do you need some humor in your life???

Unsubscribe from all current and future newsletters

Great Thought, Riddles, Videos
& Award Winning Humor w/o
commercial advertisements...

Updated daily!!!

***Turn up your speaker***

More MUSIC options

at bottom of blog!!!

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#463

From: "*** Dr. Jocular***" <dr_of_jocular@...>
Date: Fri Oct 20, 2006 1:09 pm
Subject: 'T&H' - October 20, 2006 A.D. - Funny, I don't remember being absent minded.

dr_of_jocular@...

Welcome to:

'Thought & Humor'
by Howdy

Two UNC girls were talking to each other
and one couldn't help but notice how pretty
and beautiful the others skin was. So she
asked her outright...

TheRestOfTheStory!!!

http://dr-whoami.blogspot.com/

Updated frequently during the day!!!

************************

Be sure & read the "Comments" after each blog joke -

there's more funny stuff & letters from y'all...

Write me sometime: http://write-howdy.blogspot.com/

************************

The UNC* student noticed another UNC student

walking up and down the street, wearing a sandwich

board that read...

http://dr-whoami.blogspot.com/

*Permission is hereby granted for you to change all
humor used in The"E-Mail Newspaper", 'Thought

& Humor' and its subsidiaries related to the institution
of lower learning hereby known as UNC to another
of your choice from the list below:

1) French university students
2) Harvard or U.C.-Berkeley
3) Any accredited high school or middle school
4) Any Loggerheads & Pundits
5) Any and all persnickety individuals or nincompoops
6) Any Chapel Hill, NC Citizen unless same sends an offspring
to NCSU, JSU, MSU, USC, UGA, or FSU.

7) It is against international law to transmute any jocoseness

found in this newspaper to any school if their mascot is the Wolfpack.

If attempts are made, your computer will automatically notify the

FBI, CIA, and the KGB and you will be charged with...

"performing an illegal operation".

***********************

Check out this Blog:

http://dr-whoami.blogspot.com/

Updated frequently!!!

===============

Take the best medicine of all for what ails you -- laughter:

"A person without a sense of humor is like a wagon

without springs--jolted by every pebble in the road."
~Henry Ward Beecher
"Laughter is a tranquilizer with no side effects."
--Arnold Glasow
"Laughter is by definition healthy."
--Doris Lessing
"If somebody makes me laugh, I'm his slave for life."
--Bette Midler
"The human race has one really effective weapon,

and that is laughter."
--Mark Twain
"What soap is to the body, laughter is to the soul."
-- Yiddish Proverb
"Laughter is an instant vacation."
-- Milton Berle
"Laughter is the shortest distance between two people."
-- Victor Borge

To every thing there is a season, and a time to every purpose under the
heaven: A time to be born, and a time to die; a time to plant, and a time
to pluck up that which is planted; A time to kill, and a time to heal; a
time to break down, and a time to build up; A time to weep, and a

time to laugh; a time to mourn, and a time to dance. (King Solomon)

NOTICE: The jokes published in this list were either submitted
directly to 'Thought & Humor' or are, we believe, in the public
domain. If you think that we have published a joke without
giving proper credit to its author/owner, please let us know
and we will provide appropriate credit in a future mailing.

===============

The Bible claims to be the Word of the only true God. In addition to
historical, archaeological, and scientific proofs, there are numerous
internal proofs. No such evidences exist for other "sacred writings."
The Bible was written during 1,600 years by 40 prophets, most of
whom lived in diverse cultures, at different times in history, yet who
never contradict but complement each other. For the Qur'an, Muslims
must take the word of Muhammad, just as the Book of Mormon rests
solely upon Joseph Smith's word. But every biblical prophet is confirmed
by 39 other prophets. - - Dave Hunt

===============



Four important things to KNOW:

1) For ALL (Americans, Muslims, Jews, Catholics, Hindus,

Buddhist, Asians, Presbyterians, Europeans, Baptist,

Brazilians, Mormons, Methodist, French, etc.) have sinned

& fall short of the glory of God.

2) For the wages of above (see #1) are DEATH (Hell, eternal

separation from God, & damnation) but the Gift (free & at

no charge to you) of God (Creator, Jehovah, & Trinity) is

Eternal Life (Heaven) through (in union with) Jesus Christ

(God, Lord, 2nd Person of The Trinity, Messiah, Prince of

Peace & Savior of the World).

3) For God so greatly loved & dearly prized the world

(Americans, Muslims, Jews, Catholics, Hindus, Buddhist,

Asians, Presbyterians, Europeans, Baptist, Brazilians,

Mormons, Methodist, French, etc.) that He even gave up

His only begotten (unique) Son, that whosoever (anyone,

anywhere, anytime - while still living) believes (trust in,

relies on, clings to, depends completely on) Him shall

have eternal (everlasting) life (heaven).

4) Jesus said: "I am THE WAY, THE TRUTH, & THE LIFE.

No one (male/female - American, Muslim, Jew, Catholic,

Hindu, Buddhist, Asian, Presbyterian, European, Baptist,

Brazilian, Mormons, Methodist, French, etc. ) comes (arrives)

to the Father (with GOD in Heaven) EXCEPT BY (through)

ME (no other name).

This wonderful loving GOD gives you the choice - - -
(Rev. 3:20)

{Please note that church membership, baptism, doing good

things, etc. are not requirements for becoming a Christian -

however they are great afterwards!!!}

Jesus said, "Wide is the gate and broad is the road that

leads to destruction (Hell, damnation, eternal punishment),

and many enter through it. But small is the gate and narrow

the road that leads to life (Heaven, eternal happiness,
forever with God), and only a few find it. --Matthew 7:13-14

++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

The "E-Mail Newspaper" containing 'Thought & Humor'

is sent out FREE via e-mail w/o ads. This information

was sent to you because you made the request, 'Thought

& Humor' is one small attempt to obey "The Great* Com-

mission". First published in the last century (July 26, 1997).
Soli Deo Gloria...
________ "E-Mail Newspaper (Free4u)" _________
References gleaned for great humor & information: Merry Heart,
Thomas S. Elworth, Funny List, MeMail, Daily Dose, Joke of the Day,
Kim Komando, Shagmail, MIKEY'S FUNNIES , The Daily Tease,
Crosswalk.com, CLEAN LAFFS & Gophercentral.

Quoting one is plagiarism; quoting many is research.

'Thought & Humor' respects your privacy and wishes to honor

your desires to not receive e-mail from us if that's your choice,

and we apologize if any message causes any inconvenience

to you or your computer. We have never given any reader's

e-mail addresses to a third party & have no plans to do such

unless the price is right:o) (Liberals please note - that was

humor) The E-Mail Newspaper is sent to you with love.

But indeed for this purpose I have raised you up,
that I may show My power in you, and that My
Name may be declared in all the earth. Ex 9:16

===============

EMAIL ATTACHMENTS / VIRUSES

Howdy will never send an email with attachments.

If you receive an e-mail that appears to be from

Howdy but has attachments, it was most likely

generated from a computer outside of 'T & H'

by a virus.

===============

'Thought & Humor' has been read in all 50 States,

230 Countries, 7 Continents, many Island Nations,
Oxford, Cambridge, every Ivy League School
& all major American Universities including UNC!!!

===============

Board of Advisors for 'Thought & Humor':

Did you know that 'Thought & Humor' has a distinguished Board of Advisors

that are designed to be a cross section demographically of our readership as far

as age, location, gender, marital status, education & occupation are concerned???

Bill J. - 60's - Fed. Government Employee

Bill R. - 50's - FL - Computer Operator for 911 System

Bill T. - 50's - MN - College Professor

Bob - 80's - FL - Semi - Retired Military Chaplan/Minister - D.D.

Brenda - 50's - TX - University Administor, Married

Caroline - 20's - FL - Married, Elementary School Teacher - H.B. July 22

Cindy - 40's - NC - 501(c)(3) Administrator - Married

Doug - 50's - TN - President of 501(c)(3) Corp, Married

Ellen - 20's - NJ - Registered Nurse - Married

Emily - 30's - TN - Banker, Married

Janet - 40's - MI - Married, Former Missionary to Arab Country

Jill - 50's - MN - Restaurant Owner, Married

John - 50's - Peru - Pastor, Married

Judith - 60's - TX - Retired Teacher

Katie - 20's - NC - Teacher, Married to UNC Med Student - H.B. July 28

Lee - 20's - GA - College Student

Les - 40's - Australia - Pilot

Lisa - 40's - TN - Secretary, Married

Marie - 60's - South Africa - Entrepreneur, Politician

Mamie - 30's - GA - Elementary Teacher

Patricia - 20's - MX - Entrepreneur, Politician

Phil - 50's WI - Disabled

Rob - 20's - NY - University Administor, Married

Ruth - 50's - CA - Real Estate, Involved in Spanish Ministry

Sarah - 20's - NC - UNC Student, Married

Tom - 40's - Middle East - Missionary

Shirl - 60's - CO - Finance Manager - Married to Minister

Teresa - 30's - NC - Mother

Wanda - 40's - Asia - Married - Communist Country

Advisory meetings are held weekly via the internet

and none receive monetary/pecuniary compensation

for their extensive/capacious/voluminous expertise.

===============

Dear Friends,

Goodbye for now with jocundness for both you

& your dynasty & an enkindling autumn pulchritude!!!

Your Amigo, Confrere & Sidekick,
Howdy
(probably spurious)

P.S. A bill collector came to my house the other day,

so I gave him a huge stack of old bills.

===============

How to UNSUBSCRIBE

& make poor Howdy Cry:

Go Here: http://write-howdy.blogspot.com/

Warning: Unsubscribing could restrict one's opportunities for

ascertaining uninterrupted existence for same's quintessence.

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

(You are receiving this e-mail because it has been reported to

us by a close associate of yours that you are in dire need of

jocularity/ludicrousness. If you feel that this is not the case

and that you might have received this missive/memorandum

in error, please disregard or send back to your professor/colleague.

Thank you!)

>>> Share the good news <<<
Please forward this newspaper to a friend!

But indeed for this purpose I have raised you up,
that I may show My power in you, and that My
Name may be declared in all the earth. Ex 9:16

On Yahoo!7
Break a world record with Total Girl's World�s Largest Slumber Party

#464

From: ***Professor Howdy*** <unc_girls_are_silly@...>
Date: Sat Oct 21, 2006 4:19 pm
Subject: 'Thought & Humor' - ...by Dr. Howdy - 7 new articles - 10.21.6

unc_girls_are_silly@...

'Thought & Humor'
...by Dr. Howdy" - 7 new articles

Two Girls Talking

The image �http://studentaffairs.unc.edu/images/photos/2women_talking1.jpg� cannot be displayed,
because it contains errors.

Two UNC* girls were talking to each other
and one couldn't help but notice how pretty
and beautiful the others skin was. So she
asked her outright what made her skin
so soft and beautiful.

"Well.. once a week I fill a bathtub up
with milk and just soak in it."

So the UNC student went to a farm and
spoke to the farmer. "I'd like a lot of milk."

"How much?" asked the farmer.

"Well quite a lot because I'm going to soak in it."

He asked, "Pasturized?"

"No...just up to my neck."

*Please see "comments" for additional information.

� Email to a friend �

Obedience School Failure

� Email to a friend �

Sandwich Board

The image �http://www.sunroad.cc/images/sunroadpage/images/Macdonalds.jpg� cannot be displayed, because it contains errors.

The UNC* student noticed another UNC student walking
up and down the street, wearing a sandwich board that
read "Free Big Mac!"

Strolling over with a look of concern, the first UNC
student asked, "Why? What'd he do?"

*Please see "comments"

� Email to a friend �

So Near -
Yet So Far

http://us.inmagine.com/168nwm/brandxpictures/x230/bxp59767.jpg

I have had a lot of young women complain to me
about a condition they find rampant in young men
these days. I guess I will call it "commitment phobia."
Now, this guy's willing to show interest, he's willing
to date you, charm you, agree with you, spend money
on you, and then you reach this level of mutual compat -
ibility and that's good. And then, you're on the edge
of commitment and he's gone. I hear it's pretty frustrating.
I met a beautiful woman myself many years ago and
we spent a lot of time together. We found that we agreed
on all the important things. We reached a place of affection
for each other and agreement with each other, so we were
married - right? No.

LISTEN!!!

� Email to a friend �

A Reasonable Belief

Choosing to disbelieve in something without a commitment
to coming to that disbelief by way of sound reasoning. The
burden of proof is equally significant for both belief and disbelief.
To ignore this is to address reality irresponsibly and foolishly.

� Email to a friend �

Hope & Healing

We stand to learn a lot from the Amish
community's response to murder.

� Email to a friend �

Our Blog Readers Snapshot

Num	Perc.	Country Name
52	53.06%	United States
15	15.31%	Canada
9	9.18%	Singapore
8	8.16%	Portugal
7	7.14%	Netherlands Antilles
2	2.04%	Taiwan
2	2.04%	Germany
2	2.04%	Australia
1	1.02%	Hong Kong

� Email to a friend �

from "'Thought & Humor'
...by Dr. Howdy"

***Turn up your speaker***

More MUSIC options

at bottom of blog!!!

Do you need some humor in your life???

Great Thought, Riddles, Videos
& Award Winning Humor w/o
commercial advertisements...

Updated daily!!!

On Yahoo!7
Break a world record with Total Girl's World�s Largest Slumber Party

#465

From: "***Dr. Howdy***" <hello_myfriend2day@...>
Date: Mon Oct 23, 2006 2:47 pm
Subject: ***Thought & Humor*** - October 23, 2006 A.D. - How can there be self-help "groups"?

hello_myfriend2day@...

Welcome to:

'Thought & Humor'
by Howdy

A sheriff walks into a saloon and shouts for

everyone's attention.

"Has anyone seen...

TheRestOfTheStory!!!

http://dr-whoami.blogspot.com/

Updated frequently during the day!!!

************************

Be sure & read the "Comments" after each blog joke -

there's more funny stuff & letters from y'all...

Write me sometime: http://write-howdy.blogspot.com/

************************

A civil servant is badly hurt, after falling

down the stairs at city hall. He is taken

to the hospital where he remains in a coma

for several days.

Finally, an eye opens and his doctor tells him...

http://dr-whoami.blogspot.com/

*Permission is hereby granted for you to change all
humor used in The"E-Mail Newspaper", 'Thought

7) It is against international law to transmute any jocoseness

found in this newspaper to any school if their mascot is the Wolfpack.

If attempts are made, your computer will automatically notify the

FBI, CIA, and the KGB and you will be charged with...

"performing an illegal operation".

***********************

Check out this Blog:

http://dr-whoami.blogspot.com/

Updated frequently!!!

===============

Take the best medicine of all for what ails you -- laughter:

"A person without a sense of humor is like a wagon

===============

===============



Four important things to KNOW:

1) For ALL (Americans, Muslims, Jews, Catholics, Hindus,

Buddhist, Asians, Presbyterians, Europeans, Baptist,

Brazilians, Mormons, Methodist, French, etc.) have sinned

& fall short of the glory of God.

2) For the wages of above (see #1) are DEATH (Hell, eternal

separation from God, & damnation) but the Gift (free & at

no charge to you) of God (Creator, Jehovah, & Trinity) is

Eternal Life (Heaven) through (in union with) Jesus Christ

(God, Lord, 2nd Person of The Trinity, Messiah, Prince of

Peace & Savior of the World).

3) For God so greatly loved & dearly prized the world

(Americans, Muslims, Jews, Catholics, Hindus, Buddhist,

Asians, Presbyterians, Europeans, Baptist, Brazilians,

Mormons, Methodist, French, etc.) that He even gave up

His only begotten (unique) Son, that whosoever (anyone,

anywhere, anytime - while still living) believes (trust in,

relies on, clings to, depends completely on) Him shall

have eternal (everlasting) life (heaven).

4) Jesus said: "I am THE WAY, THE TRUTH, & THE LIFE.

No one (male/female - American, Muslim, Jew, Catholic,

Hindu, Buddhist, Asian, Presbyterian, European, Baptist,

Brazilian, Mormons, Methodist, French, etc. ) comes (arrives)

to the Father (with GOD in Heaven) EXCEPT BY (through)

ME (no other name).

This wonderful loving GOD gives you the choice - - -
(Rev. 3:20)

{Please note that church membership, baptism, doing good

things, etc. are not requirements for becoming a Christian -

however they are great afterwards!!!}

Jesus said, "Wide is the gate and broad is the road that

leads to destruction (Hell, damnation, eternal punishment),

and many enter through it. But small is the gate and narrow

the road that leads to life (Heaven, eternal happiness,
forever with God), and only a few find it. --Matthew 7:13-14

++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

The "E-Mail Newspaper" containing 'Thought & Humor'

is sent out FREE via e-mail w/o ads. This information

was sent to you because you made the request, 'Thought

& Humor' is one small attempt to obey "The Great* Com-

Quoting one is plagiarism; quoting many is research.

'Thought & Humor' respects your privacy and wishes to honor

your desires to not receive e-mail from us if that's your choice,

and we apologize if any message causes any inconvenience

to you or your computer. We have never given any reader's

e-mail addresses to a third party & have no plans to do such

unless the price is right:o) (Liberals please note - that was

humor) The E-Mail Newspaper is sent to you with love.

But indeed for this purpose I have raised you up,
that I may show My power in you, and that My
Name may be declared in all the earth. Ex 9:16

===============

EMAIL ATTACHMENTS / VIRUSES

Howdy will never send an email with attachments.

If you receive an e-mail that appears to be from

Howdy but has attachments, it was most likely

generated from a computer outside of 'T & H'

by a virus.

===============

'Thought & Humor' has been read in all 50 States,

230 Countries, 7 Continents, many Island Nations,
Oxford, Cambridge, every Ivy League School
& all major American Universities including UNC!!!

===============

Board of Advisors for 'Thought & Humor':

Did you know that 'Thought & Humor' has a distinguished Board of Advisors

that are designed to be a cross section demographically of our readership as far

as age, location, gender, marital status, education & occupation are concerned???

Bill J. - 60's - Fed. Government Employee

Bill R. - 50's - FL - Computer Operator for 911 System

Bill T. - 50's - MN - College Professor

Bob - 80's - FL - Semi - Retired Military Chaplan/Minister - D.D.

Brenda - 50's - TX - University Administor, Married

Caroline - 20's - FL - Married, Elementary School Teacher - H.B. July 22

Cindy - 40's - NC - 501(c)(3) Administrator - Married

Doug - 50's - TN - President of 501(c)(3) Corp, Married

Ellen - 20's - NJ - Registered Nurse - Married

Emily - 30's - TN - Banker, Married

Janet - 40's - MI - Married, Former Missionary to Arab Country

Jill - 50's - MN - Restaurant Owner, Married

John - 50's - Peru - Pastor, Married

Judith - 60's - TX - Retired Teacher

Katie - 20's - NC - Teacher, Married to UNC Med Student - H.B. July 28

Lee - 20's - GA - College Student

Les - 40's - Australia - Pilot

Lisa - 40's - TN - Secretary, Married

Marie - 60's - South Africa - Entrepreneur, Politician

Mamie - 30's - GA - Elementary Teacher

Patricia - 20's - MX - Entrepreneur, Politician

Phil - 50's WI - Disabled

Rob - 20's - NY - University Administor, Married

Ruth - 50's - CA - Real Estate, Involved in Spanish Ministry

Sarah - 20's - NC - UNC Student, Married

Tom - 40's - Middle East - Missionary

Shirl - 60's - CO - Finance Manager - Married to Minister

Teresa - 30's - NC - Mother

Wanda - 40's - Asia - Married - Communist Country

Advisory meetings are held weekly via the internet

and none receive monetary/pecuniary compensation

for their extensive/capacious/voluminous expertise.

===============

Dear Friends,

Goodbye for now with jocundness for both you

& your dynasty & an enkindling autumn pulchritude!!!

Your Amigo, Confrere & Sidekick,
Howdy
(probably spurious)

P.S. The man who fell into an upholstery machine is fully recovered.

===============

How to UNSUBSCRIBE

& make poor Howdy Cry:

Go Here: http://write-howdy.blogspot.com/

Warning: Unsubscribing could restrict one's opportunities for

ascertaining uninterrupted existence for same's quintessence.

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

(You are receiving this e-mail because it has been reported to

us by a close associate of yours that you are in dire need of

jocularity/ludicrousness. If you feel that this is not the case

and that you might have received this missive/memorandum

in error, please disregard or send back to your professor/colleague.

Thank you!)

>>> Share the good news <<<
Please forward this newspaper to a friend!

But indeed for this purpose I have raised you up,
that I may show My power in you, and that My
Name may be declared in all the earth. Ex 9:16

Do you Yahoo!?
Cars: Buy and sell, news, reviews, videos and more

#466

From: ***Professor Howdy*** <professor_ludicrous@...>
Date: Tue Oct 24, 2006 1:50 pm
Subject: 'Thought & Humor' - ...by Dr. Howdy - 13 new articles - 10.24.6

professor_ludicrous@...

'Thought & Humor'
...by Dr. Howdy" - 13 new articles

The Sheriff In The Saloon

http://www.sogonow.com/archives/Burlington_Old%20Town%20Saloon%20email.jpg

A sheriff walks into a saloon and shouts for everyone's attention.
"Has anyone seen Brown Paper Jake?"

"What's he look like?", asks one shoddy-looking cowboy.

"Well", replies the Sheriff. "He wears a brown paper hat,
a brown paper waistcoat, a brown paper shirt, brown paper
boots, brown paper pants, and a brown paper jacket."

"So what's he wanted for?", asks the same cowboy.

*Please see blog for his answer...

� Email to a friend �

Mr. Taylor

� Email to a friend �

Word Puzzle

Match the words in the left-hand column with
the correct definition in the right-hand column.

The answers are located in "comments" on 'T&H's blog.

1. dubiety .............. A. To insert between
2. rollick ................ B. A socially awkward or tactless act
3. ventricumbent ... C. To have fun, especially in a loud way
4. dilatory .............. D. Freedom from agitation or excitement of mind
5. exsert ................. E. Lying face down; prone
6. interlard ............. F. To thrust out or project something
7. sangfroid ........... G. Obstinate and unwilling to cooperate
8. parvanimity ....... H. A matter of doubt
9. mulish ................. I. Marked by procrastination or delay
10. gaucherie ......... J. Pettiness: meanness

� Email to a friend �

Monday's Riddles

http://www.susandunn.cc/oriental3-girl-computer.jpg

1) A mansion I am
For many, many things.
I can live for a very long time.
As I grow,
I wear more jewelry;
However, my jewelry is hidden.
Only when I die
Do others find
How old I've grown
And just where my jewelry lies.

http://www.edenbridgetown.com/assets_2006/community_page/girl_computer.jpg

2) In your hand I shall rest,
As your eyes aren't the best.
I walk along showing you where to go,
After all I've been trained to know.
On four like a chair,
You follow me closely until I bring you there.
What am I?

The image �http://www.carmengroup.com/education/images/girl_computer.jpg� cannot be displayed, because it contains errors.

The image �http://www.carmengroup.com/education/images/girl_computer.jpg� cannot be displayed, because it contains errors.

3) Which vegetable is never sold tinned, frozen, freeze dried,
cooked or anything else other than fresh?

The image �http://www.metroschool.org/images/girl_computer.gif� cannot be displayed, because it contains errors.

The image �http://www.metroschool.org/images/girl_computer.gif� cannot be displayed, because it contains errors.

4) This thing all things devour:
Birds, beast, trees, flowers;
Gnaws iron, bites steel;
Grinds hard stones to meal;
Slays king, ruins town,
and beats high mountains down.

http://www.dmu.ac.uk/Images/girl_computer_tcm2-17072.jpg

5) It can be said:
To be gold is to be good,
To be stone is to be nothing,
To be glass is to be fragile,
To be cold is to be cruel.
What am I?

http://www.klausact.com/bragparty/images/secondary_pages/accents/girl_computer.gif

6) We fit inside every book or two,
No telling what we do.

We may change lives forever,
We are clever,

Or maybe just weak wit,
We even make up the ingredients to a banana split!

What are we?

http://www.ncl.ac.uk/afrd/assets/photos/girl_computer.jpg

7) The more you make of me the more you
leave behind. What am I?

*You may find the answers to the above in "comments" on the blog...

http://www.bsccp.org.uk/docs/images/keynote/woman_thinking.gif

� Email to a friend �

UNC Exam Question

The image �http://www.cs.unc.edu/WhyJoinUs/Graduate/Images/Classroom.jpg� cannot be displayed, because it contains errors.

Sally's Mom had three daughters.
The first one was named April.
The second one was named May.
What was the third one's name?

*Answer is in "comments" on 'T&H's blog...

� Email to a friend �

Lawyer Humor

http://z.about.com/d/movies/1/0/G/b/highcrimesnewrelease.jpg

Q. What's the difference between a female lawyer and a pit bull?
A. Lipstick.

� Email to a friend �

Injured Civil Servant

The image �http://www.traumaburn.com/images/gurney(blur).jpg� cannot be displayed, because it contains errors.

A civil servant is badly hurt, after falling down the stairs at city
hall. He is taken to the hospital where he remains in a coma for
several days.

Finally, an eye opens and his doctor tells him, "My friend, I
have bad news and I have good news. First of all, you will
never be able to work again."

"Okay," muttered the injured bureaucrat. "What's the bad news?"

� Email to a friend �

Dr. Willis

Dr. Willis finished examining Matilda and went into
the hallway to talk to her husband Bernie.

"I don't want to alarm you," he said to Bernie,
"but I don't like the way your wife looks at all."

"Me neither, Doc." replied Bernie. "But she's a great
cook and real good with the kids."

� Email to a friend �

Marriage Is A Gamble

The image �http://www.promoteyourwebsite.com/images/couple-computer.jpg� cannot be displayed, because it contains errors.

* You start with a pair.
* He shows a diamond.
* She shows a heart.
* Her father has a club.
* His father has a spade.
* There's usually a joker around somewhere,
* but after a while he becomes a king and
* she becomes a queen.
* Then they end up with a full house.

� Email to a friend �

UNC Terrorists

http://www.classicalvalues.com/CocoShreds3.jpg

Q. Did you hear about the dead UNC terrorists?
A. They died faxing a letter bomb.

� Email to a friend �

WTC From Above

An aircraft filled with 101st Airborne Division soldiers
en route to Afghanistan circled the World Trade Center
disaster site in lower Manhattan last week to remind the
troops of why they were deploying. It was the first time
since Sept. 11 that the Federal Aviation Administration
allowed a commercial plane to fly over the site.

An aircraft filled with 101st Airborne Division soldiers en
route to Afghanistan circled the World Trade Center disaster
site in lower Manhattan last week to remind the troops of
why they were deploying. It was the first time since Sept.
11 that the Federal Aviation Administration allowed a
commercial plane to fly over the site.

LARGER PICTURE!!!

� Email to a friend �

Questions & Answers

In a question and answer period after one of his lectures,
C.S. Lewis was asked which of the world's religions gives
its followers the greatest happiness. Lewis paused and
said this: "While it lasts, the religion of worshipping one -
self is best."

� Email to a friend �

Our Blog Readers Snapshot

Num	Perc.	Country Name
40	56.34%	United States
6	8.45%	Canada
5	7.04%	New Zealand
4	5.63%	Mongolia
4	5.63%	United Kingdom
2	2.82%	Romania
2	2.82%	Philippines
2	2.82%	Singapore
2	2.82%	Sweden
2	2.82%	Portugal
1	1.41%	Australia
1	1.41%	Ukraine

Above numbers give a snapshot of the locations
of our last 100 readers around 7 A.M. today.
This will change completely in the next few
minutes. Updates are posted in "comments"
as the day progresses. 'Thought & Humor'
has been read in ALL 230 countries of the
world. A numerical counter is shown at the
top of this award winning blog...

� Email to a friend �

from "'Thought & Humor'
...by Dr. Howdy"

***Turn up your speaker***

More MUSIC options

at bottom of blog!!!

Do you need some humor in your life???

Great Thought, Riddles, Videos
& Award Winning Humor w/o
commercial advertisements...

Updated daily!!!

On Yahoo!7
Men's Health Radio: Work out, chill out, or just tune in

#467

From: ***Professor Howdy*** <unc_girls_are_silly@...>
Date: Tue Oct 24, 2006 2:43 pm
Subject: ***Thought & Humor*** - October 24, 2006 A.D. - Just 2 more months 'til Christmas...

unc_girls_are_silly@...

Welcome to:

'Thought & Humor'

by Howdy

A UNC grad named Darla had applied for

a job and when she returned home, her mother

asked how the interview went...

TheRestOfTheStory!!!

http://dr-whoami.blogspot.com/

Updated frequently during the day!!!

************************

Be sure & read the "Comments" after each blog joke -

there's more funny stuff & letters from y'all...

Write me sometime: http://write-howdy.blogspot.com/

************************

Having trouble with the doctor's notes

on an emergency case which read,

"Shot in the lumbar region," the UNC*

grad was flustered and at her wit's end...

http://dr-whoami.blogspot.com/

*Permission is hereby granted for you to change all
humor used in The"E-Mail Newspaper", 'Thought

7) It is against international law to transmute any jocoseness

found in this newspaper to any school if their mascot is the Wolfpack.

If attempts are made, your computer will automatically notify the

FBI, CIA, and the KGB and you will be charged with...

"performing an illegal operation".

***********************

Check out this Blog:

http://dr-whoami.blogspot.com/

Updated frequently!!!

===============

Take the best medicine of all for what ails you -- laughter:

"A person without a sense of humor is like a wagon

===============

===============



Four important things to KNOW:

1) For ALL (Americans, Muslims, Jews, Catholics, Hindus,

Buddhist, Asians, Presbyterians, Europeans, Baptist,

Brazilians, Mormons, Methodist, French, etc.) have sinned

& fall short of the glory of God.

2) For the wages of above (see #1) are DEATH (Hell, eternal

separation from God, & damnation) but the Gift (free & at

no charge to you) of God (Creator, Jehovah, & Trinity) is

Eternal Life (Heaven) through (in union with) Jesus Christ

(God, Lord, 2nd Person of The Trinity, Messiah, Prince of

Peace & Savior of the World).

3) For God so greatly loved & dearly prized the world

(Americans, Muslims, Jews, Catholics, Hindus, Buddhist,

Asians, Presbyterians, Europeans, Baptist, Brazilians,

Mormons, Methodist, French, etc.) that He even gave up

His only begotten (unique) Son, that whosoever (anyone,

anywhere, anytime - while still living) believes (trust in,

relies on, clings to, depends completely on) Him shall

have eternal (everlasting) life (heaven).

4) Jesus said: "I am THE WAY, THE TRUTH, & THE LIFE.

No one (male/female - American, Muslim, Jew, Catholic,

Hindu, Buddhist, Asian, Presbyterian, European, Baptist,

Brazilian, Mormons, Methodist, French, etc. ) comes (arrives)

to the Father (with GOD in Heaven) EXCEPT BY (through)

ME (no other name).

This wonderful loving GOD gives you the choice - - -
(Rev. 3:20)

{Please note that church membership, baptism, doing good

things, etc. are not requirements for becoming a Christian -

however they are great afterwards!!!}

Jesus said, "Wide is the gate and broad is the road that

leads to destruction (Hell, damnation, eternal punishment),

and many enter through it. But small is the gate and narrow

the road that leads to life (Heaven, eternal happiness,
forever with God), and only a few find it. --Matthew 7:13-14

++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

The "E-Mail Newspaper" containing 'Thought & Humor'

is sent out FREE via e-mail w/o ads. This information

was sent to you because you made the request, 'Thought

& Humor' is one small attempt to obey "The Great* Com-

Quoting one is plagiarism; quoting many is research.

'Thought & Humor' respects your privacy and wishes to honor

your desires to not receive e-mail from us if that's your choice,

and we apologize if any message causes any inconvenience

to you or your computer. We have never given any reader's

e-mail addresses to a third party & have no plans to do such

unless the price is right:o) (Liberals please note - that was

humor) The E-Mail Newspaper is sent to you with love.

But indeed for this purpose I have raised you up,
that I may show My power in you, and that My
Name may be declared in all the earth. Ex 9:16

===============

EMAIL ATTACHMENTS / VIRUSES

Howdy will never send an email with attachments.

If you receive an e-mail that appears to be from

Howdy but has attachments, it was most likely

generated from a computer outside of 'T & H'

by a virus.

===============

'Thought & Humor' has been read in all 50 States,

230 Countries, 7 Continents, many Island Nations,
Oxford, Cambridge, every Ivy League School
& all major American Universities including UNC!!!

===============

Board of Advisors for 'Thought & Humor':

Did you know that 'Thought & Humor' has a distinguished Board of Advisors

that are designed to be a cross section demographically of our readership as far

as age, location, gender, marital status, education & occupation are concerned???

Bill J. - 60's - Fed. Government Employee

Bill R. - 50's - FL - Computer Operator for 911 System

Bill T. - 50's - MN - College Professor

Bob - 80's - FL - Semi - Retired Military Chaplan/Minister - D.D.

Brenda - 50's - TX - University Administor, Married

Caroline - 20's - FL - Married, Elementary School Teacher - H.B. July 22

Cindy - 40's - NC - 501(c)(3) Administrator - Married

Doug - 50's - TN - President of 501(c)(3) Corp, Married

Ellen - 20's - NJ - Registered Nurse - Married

Emily - 30's - TN - Banker, Married

Janet - 40's - MI - Married, Former Missionary to Arab Country

Jill - 50's - MN - Restaurant Owner, Married

John - 50's - Peru - Pastor, Married

Judith - 60's - TX - Retired Teacher

Katie - 20's - NC - Teacher, Married to UNC Med Student - H.B. July 28

Lee - 20's - GA - College Student

Les - 40's - Australia - Pilot

Lisa - 40's - TN - Secretary, Married

Marie - 60's - South Africa - Entrepreneur, Politician

Mamie - 30's - GA - Elementary Teacher

Patricia - 20's - MX - Entrepreneur, Politician

Phil - 50's WI - Disabled

Rob - 20's - NY - University Administor, Married

Ruth - 50's - CA - Real Estate, Involved in Spanish Ministry

Sarah - 20's - NC - UNC Student, Married

Tom - 40's - Middle East - Missionary

Shirl - 60's - CO - Finance Manager - Married to Minister

Teresa - 30's - NC - Mother

Wanda - 40's - Asia - Married - Communist Country

Advisory meetings are held weekly via the internet

and none receive monetary/pecuniary compensation

for their extensive/capacious/voluminous expertise.

===============

Dear Friends,

Goodbye for now with jocundness for both you

& your dynasty & an enkindling autumn pulchritude!!!

Your Amigo, Confrere & Sidekick,
Howdy
(probably spurious)

P.S. We have mileage, yardage and footage.
Why don't we have inchage?

===============

How to UNSUBSCRIBE

& make poor Howdy Cry:

Go Here: http://write-howdy.blogspot.com/

Warning: Unsubscribing could restrict one's opportunities for

ascertaining uninterrupted existence for same's quintessence.

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

(You are receiving this e-mail because it has been reported to

us by a close associate of yours that you are in dire need of

jocularity/ludicrousness. If you feel that this is not the case

and that you might have received this missive/memorandum

in error, please disregard or send back to your professor/colleague.

Thank you!)

>>> Share the good news <<<
Please forward this newspaper to a friend!

But indeed for this purpose I have raised you up,
that I may show My power in you, and that My
Name may be declared in all the earth. Ex 9:16

Do you Yahoo!?
Cars: Buy and sell, news, reviews, videos and more

#468

From: *** Professor Howdy *** <humorthought2u@...>
Date: Wed Oct 25, 2006 11:27 am
Subject: 'Thought & Humor' - ...by Dr. Howdy - 11 new articles - 10.25.6

humorthought2u@...

'Thought & Humor'
...by Dr. Howdy - 11 new articles

UNC Job Interview

A UNC grad named Darla had applied for a job and when
she returned home, her mother asked how the interview went.

"Pretty good, I think," replied Darla, "but if I go to work
there I won't get a vacation until I'm married."

Her mother, of course, had never heard of such a thing.
"Is that what they told you?"

"No", replied Darla, "but right on the application it said
'vacation time may not be taken until you've had your First
Anniversary.'"

� Email to a friend �

The Father Of Our Country
Experienced A Miracle
Early In His Military Career

This account is widely known and was included
in most school history textbooks, until recent
changes caused it to be deleted from many books
because it is not "politically correct".

During the French and Indian war at the Battle of the
Monongahela, young Colonel Washington was engaged
in a fierce skirmish with the Indians. An easy target in
his bold red coat, he crisscrossed the battlefield carrying
General Braddock's orders to the troops. The Indian
warriors later acknowledged that they were targeting
all officers--and particularly Washington--in the bright
garb. Yet Washington survived. There were eighty-six
British and American officers involved in the battle; sixty-
three of them died. Colonel Washington was the only officer
on horseback who was not killed, and later, the Indians
testified that they repeatedly shot at him, and were surprised
that he never fell. They believed he was protected by an
invisible power and that no bullet, bayonet, arrow or tomahawk
could harm him.

Years later, the Indian chief sought Washington out in order to
tell him what had happened in the battle. The Chief said, "I am
a chief and ruler over my tribes. I have traveled a long and weary
path that I might see the young warrior of the great battle. [On
that day] I called to my men and said, 'Quick, let your aim be
certain, and he dies.' Our rifles were leveled, rifles which, but
f or you, knew not how to miss--'twas all in vain, a power mightier
far than we, shielded you. I am come to pay homage to the man
who is the particular favorite of Heaven, and who can never die
in battle."

Washington himself later wrote to his brother John, "By the all-
powerful dispensations of Providence, I have been protected beyond
all human probability or expectation; for I had four bullets through
my coat, and two horses shot under me, yet escaped unhurt, although
death was leveling my companions on every side of me!"

� Email to a friend �

A Letter To Friends

http://www.rusearching.com/spotted/images/man-reading-bible.jpg

Dear Friends,

This is what the Lord says, He who made the earth,
the Lord who formed it and established it -- the Lord
is His Name: Call to Me and I will answer you and tell
you great and unsearchable things you do not know.

Sincerely,
Jeremiah

P.S. Please see "comments" on blog.

� Email to a friend �

UNC Grad Humor

Having trouble with the doctor's notes on an emergency case
which read, "Shot in the lumbar region," the UNC* grad was
flustered and at her wit's end.

At last she thought she had it figured out and brightened
up as she typed up the record, "Wounded in the woods."

*Please see "comments" on blog

� Email to a friend �

Communing With The Dead

Ghosts, goblins and ghouls are the stuff
of Halloween legends and costumes, but
are they real???

� Email to a friend �

Talking To Company Nurse

� Email to a friend �

Are You Sure???

Two atoms bump into each other.
One says "I think I lost an electron!"
The other asks, "Are you sure?",
to which the first replies, "I'm positive."

� Email to a friend �

Tuesday's Riddles

The image
�http://www.archive-cd.com/images/couple_computer.jpg� cannot be displayed, because it contains errors.

1) I have eyes but I see nothing. I have ears, but I
hear nothing. I have a mouth, but cannot speak. I
always will look just as I look now. If I am young,
I will stay young. If I am old, I will remain old.
What Am I?

http://www.tavajgraphics.com/images/couple-on-computer.png

2) Name at least 10 parts of the human body that
are only 3 letters long. You cannot use slang.

The image �http://www.thecareexperts.com/images/OS-Minority-couple-computer.jpg� cannot be displayed, because it contains errors.

The image �http://www.thecareexperts.com/images/OS-Minority-couple-computer.jpg� cannot be displayed, because it contains errors.

3) Late afternoons I often bathe.
I'll soak in water piping hot.
My essence goes through my see through clothes.
Used up am I; I've gone to pot.

*Answers are in blog "comments"

The image �http://www.promoteyourwebsite.com/images/couple-computer.jpg� cannot be displayed, because it contains errors.

� Email to a friend �

Dating Story

� Email to a friend �

Many, Many Words

You may have observed what Steven Pinker has dubbed
the "euphemism treadmill." A euphemism is the substitution
of a mild or vague expression for one that is perceived to be
blunt or offensive (for example, the replacement of "to die"
with "to pass away"). The euphemism treadmill is the process
by which, over time, a common euphemism becomes so identified
with the word it has replaced that it loses any power to shield
from offense. One example cited by Wikipedia as an illustration
is the phrase "concentration camp." This euphemism was originally
used by the British in the early twentieth century to make a camp
of civilian prisoners sound mundane. During the Second World War,
the phrase became so inseparably linked to the Nazi death camps
that it lost all euphemistic value.

� Email to a friend �

Our Blog Readers Snapshot

Num	Perc.	Country Name
46	48.42%	United States
37	38.95%	Canada
3	3.16%	United Kingdom
2	2.11%	Saudi Arabia
2	2.11%	Portugal
2	2.11%	Mongolia
1	1.05%	Japan
1	1.05%	Taiwan
1	1.05%	Sri Lanka

� Email to a friend �

from "'Thought & Humor'
...by Dr. Howdy"

***Turn up your speaker***

More MUSIC options

at bottom of blog!!!

Do you need some humor in your life???

Great Thought, Riddles, Videos
& Award Winning Humor w/o
commercial advertisements...

Updated daily!!!

On Yahoo!7
PS Trixi: Check back weekly for Trixi's latest update

#469

From: ***Professor Howdy*** <professor_tom_foolery@...>
Date: Wed Oct 25, 2006 3:47 pm
Subject: ***Thought & Humor*** - October 25, 2006 A.D. - Once you've seen one shopping center, you've seen a mall...

professor_tom_foolery@...

Welcome to:

'Thought & Humor'

by Howdy

Two cab drivers met. "Hey," asked one,

"Why did you ...

TheRestOfTheStory!!!

http://dr-whoami.blogspot.com/

Updated frequently during the day!!!

************************

Be sure & read the "Comments" after each blog joke -

there's more funny stuff & letters from y'all...

Write me sometime: http://write-howdy.blogspot.com/

************************

A UNC* student buys a ticket and wins the lottery.

He goes to Raleigh to claim it and the man verifies

his ticket number. The UNC student says...

http://dr-whoami.blogspot.com/

*Permission is hereby granted for you to change all
humor used in The"E-Mail Newspaper", 'Thought

7) It is against international law to transmute any jocoseness

found in this newspaper to any school if their mascot is the Wolfpack.

If attempts are made, your computer will automatically notify the

FBI, CIA, and the KGB and you will be charged with...

"performing an illegal operation".

***********************

Check out this Blog:

http://dr-whoami.blogspot.com/

Updated frequently!!!

===============

Take the best medicine of all for what ails you -- laughter:

"A person without a sense of humor is like a wagon

===============

===============



Four important things to KNOW:

1) For ALL (Americans, Muslims, Jews, Catholics, Hindus,

Buddhist, Asians, Presbyterians, Europeans, Baptist,

Brazilians, Mormons, Methodist, French, etc.) have sinned

& fall short of the glory of God.

2) For the wages of above (see #1) are DEATH (Hell, eternal

separation from God, & damnation) but the Gift (free & at

no charge to you) of God (Creator, Jehovah, & Trinity) is

Eternal Life (Heaven) through (in union with) Jesus Christ

(God, Lord, 2nd Person of The Trinity, Messiah, Prince of

Peace & Savior of the World).

3) For God so greatly loved & dearly prized the world

(Americans, Muslims, Jews, Catholics, Hindus, Buddhist,

Asians, Presbyterians, Europeans, Baptist, Brazilians,

Mormons, Methodist, French, etc.) that He even gave up

His only begotten (unique) Son, that whosoever (anyone,

anywhere, anytime - while still living) believes (trust in,

relies on, clings to, depends completely on) Him shall

have eternal (everlasting) life (heaven).

4) Jesus said: "I am THE WAY, THE TRUTH, & THE LIFE.

No one (male/female - American, Muslim, Jew, Catholic,

Hindu, Buddhist, Asian, Presbyterian, European, Baptist,

Brazilian, Mormons, Methodist, French, etc. ) comes (arrives)

to the Father (with GOD in Heaven) EXCEPT BY (through)

ME (no other name).

This wonderful loving GOD gives you the choice - - -
(Rev. 3:20)

{Please note that church membership, baptism, doing good

things, etc. are not requirements for becoming a Christian -

however they are great afterwards!!!}

Jesus said, "Wide is the gate and broad is the road that

leads to destruction (Hell, damnation, eternal punishment),

and many enter through it. But small is the gate and narrow

the road that leads to life (Heaven, eternal happiness,
forever with God), and only a few find it. --Matthew 7:13-14

++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

The "E-Mail Newspaper" containing 'Thought & Humor'

is sent out FREE via e-mail w/o ads. This information

was sent to you because you made the request, 'Thought

& Humor' is one small attempt to obey "The Great* Com-

Quoting one is plagiarism; quoting many is research.

'Thought & Humor' respects your privacy and wishes to honor

your desires to not receive e-mail from us if that's your choice,

and we apologize if any message causes any inconvenience

to you or your computer. We have never given any reader's

e-mail addresses to a third party & have no plans to do such

unless the price is right:o) (Liberals please note - that was

humor) The E-Mail Newspaper is sent to you with love.

But indeed for this purpose I have raised you up,
that I may show My power in you, and that My
Name may be declared in all the earth. Ex 9:16

===============

EMAIL ATTACHMENTS / VIRUSES

Howdy will never send an email with attachments.

If you receive an e-mail that appears to be from

Howdy but has attachments, it was most likely

generated from a computer outside of 'T & H'

by a virus.

===============

'Thought & Humor' has been read in all 50 States,

230 Countries, 7 Continents, many Island Nations,
Oxford, Cambridge, every Ivy League School
& all major American Universities including UNC!!!

===============

Board of Advisors for 'Thought & Humor':

Did you know that 'Thought & Humor' has a distinguished Board of Advisors

that are designed to be a cross section demographically of our readership as far

as age, location, gender, marital status, education & occupation are concerned???

Bill J. - 60's - Fed. Government Employee

Bill R. - 50's - FL - Computer Operator for 911 System

Bill T. - 50's - MN - College Professor

Bob - 80's - FL - Semi - Retired Military Chaplan/Minister - D.D.

Brenda - 50's - TX - University Administor, Married

Caroline - 20's - FL - Married, Elementary School Teacher - H.B. July 22

Cindy - 40's - NC - 501(c)(3) Administrator - Married

Doug - 50's - TN - President of 501(c)(3) Corp, Married

Ellen - 20's - NJ - Registered Nurse - Married

Emily - 30's - TN - Banker, Married

Janet - 40's - MI - Married, Former Missionary to Arab Country

Jill - 50's - MN - Restaurant Owner, Married

John - 50's - Peru - Pastor, Married

Judith - 60's - TX - Retired Teacher

Katie - 20's - NC - Teacher, Married to UNC Med Student - H.B. July 28

Lee - 20's - GA - College Student

Les - 40's - Australia - Pilot

Lisa - 40's - TN - Secretary, Married

Marie - 60's - South Africa - Entrepreneur, Politician

Mamie - 30's - GA - Elementary Teacher

Patricia - 20's - MX - Entrepreneur, Politician

Phil - 50's WI - Disabled

Rob - 20's - NY - University Administor, Married

Ruth - 50's - CA - Real Estate, Involved in Spanish Ministry

Sarah - 20's - NC - UNC Student, Married

Tom - 40's - Middle East - Missionary

Shirl - 60's - CO - Finance Manager - Married to Minister

Teresa - 30's - NC - Mother

Wanda - 40's - Asia - Married - Communist Country

Advisory meetings are held weekly via the internet

and none receive monetary/pecuniary compensation

for their extensive/capacious/voluminous expertise.

===============

Dear Friends,

Goodbye for now with jocundness for both you

& your dynasty & an enkindling autumn pulchritude!!!

Your Amigo, Confrere & Sidekick,
Howdy
(probably spurious)

P.S. All of us could take a lesson from the weather.

It pays no attention to criticism.

===============

How to UNSUBSCRIBE

& make poor Howdy Cry:

Go Here: http://write-howdy.blogspot.com/

Warning: Unsubscribing could restrict one's opportunities for

ascertaining uninterrupted existence for same's quintessence.

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

(You are receiving this e-mail because it has been reported to

us by a close associate of yours that you are in dire need of

jocularity/ludicrousness. If you feel that this is not the case

and that you might have received this missive/memorandum

in error, please disregard or send back to your professor/colleague.

Thank you!)

>>> Share the good news <<<
Please forward this newspaper to a friend!

But indeed for this purpose I have raised you up,
that I may show My power in you, and that My
Name may be declared in all the earth. Ex 9:16

Talk is cheap. Use Yahoo! Messenger to make PC-to-Phone calls. Great rates starting at 1�/min.

#470

From: "*** Dr. Howdy ***" <professor_ridiculous@...>
Date: Thu Oct 26, 2006 1:20 pm
Subject: 'Thought & Humor' - ...by Dr. Howdy - 6 new articles - 10.26.6

professor_ridiculous@...

'Thought & Humor'
...by Dr. Howdy - 6 new articles

Howdy -
as a kid
on left

� Email to a friend �

Two Cab Drivers

http://www.lib.unc.edu/ncc/pcoll/01orange/p1-68.5.jpg

Two cab drivers met near the UNC campus. "Hey," asked
one, "Why did you paint one side of your cab red and the
other side blue?"

"Well," the other responded, "When I get into an accident,
you should see how all the witnesses contradict each other."

� Email to a friend �

The Lotto

A UNC* student buys a ticket and wins the lottery.
He goes to Raleigh to claim it and the man verifies
his ticket number. The UNC student says, "I want
my $20 million."

The man replied, "No, sir. It doesn't work that way.
We give you a million today and then you'll get the
rest spread out for the next 19 years."

The UNC student said, "Oh, no. I want all my money
right now! I won it and I want it."

Again, the man explain that he would only get a million
that day and the rest during the next 19 years.

The UNC student, furious with the man, screams out,
"Look, I want my money! If you're not going to give
me my $20 million right now, then I want my dollar back!"

*Additional details available in blog "comments"...

� Email to a friend �

How To Improve Your Man

Now here's a memory for your summer vacation scrapbook.
You got kissed by a dolphin. No thank you. But it happens to
people every day at Sea World, this park where you can see
whales and fish and seals do these amazing tricks. Those
dolphins are really something. They will jump through hoops
(I wish we could get kids to do that), they'll dance on their tails,
and oh yeah, did I mention jumping out of the water and kissing
tourists? But if you want to understand why they do all this neat
stuff, you have to watch what they do after each trick. They swim
around the pool and straight for the guy with the bag. You know
what's in that bag. Fish! Yummy fish! If you want a dolphin to do
something, give him a fish and he'll do it again! Men are a lot like
that...

HEAR!!!

� Email to a friend �

With The End In Sight

Directors of a newly commissioned airport in Thailand are finding
themselves plagued with an interesting problem: there are people
everywhere. But this is not to say the problem is too many travelers;
the problem is that there are too many people who are not traveling
anywhere.

In addition to the number of travelers passing through Suvarnabhumi
Airport each day--roughly 100,000--there are more than 100,000
people visiting the ultra-modern airport each day--with no intention
whatsoever of getting on a plane. They are there to take pictures,
explore the buildings, and eat their sack lunches.

"So many people are coming for sightseeing, and we're pleading with
them to stop," said the president of Airports of Thailand. "They're eating
here and there, parking their cars in a mess." In the beginning, airport
directors were happy to see people familiarizing themselves with the
place, learning their way around, and generally taking pride in the new
airport. But as one official notes, "It's no longer familiarization--it has
become a picnic."

� Email to a friend �

Our Blog Readers Snapshot

Num	Perc.	Country Name
29	32.95%	United States
14	15.91%	Sweden
11	12.50%	Costa Rica
11	12.50%	Canada
7	7.95%	United Kingdom
4	4.55%	Singapore
4	4.55%	Australia
4	4.55%	Belgium
2	2.27%	Mauritius
2	2.27%	India

� Email to a friend �

from "'Thought & Humor'
...by Dr. Howdy"

Do you need some humor in your life???

Great Thought, Riddles, Videos
& Award Winning Humor w/o
commercial advertisements...

Updated daily!!!

***Turn up your speaker***

More MUSIC options

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Mobile Business Solutions: make technology work harder for you

#471

From: ***Professor Howdy*** <humor4u2day@...>
Date: Fri Oct 27, 2006 2:18 pm
Subject: 'Thought & Humor' - ...by Dr. Howdy - 10 new articles - 10.27.6

humor4u2day@...

'Thought & Humor'
...by Dr. Howdy - 10 new articles

Crime Shows
The Good, The Bad & The Ugly

http://online.tvguide.com/images/pgimg/law-and-order.jpg

The good part is their love for seeing justice done.
The bad part is the need to wade through so many
depictions of evil to get there...

MORE!!!

� Email to a friend �

New Book

My wife suggested a book for me to read
to enhance our relationship.

It's titled: "Women are from Venus, Men
are..."

See her complete answer on 'T&H's blog!!!

� Email to a friend �

Waiting For An Ambulance

.

In Chapel Hill, NC, a UNC* grad was hit by a car.
While waiting for an ambulance, the policeman tucked
a blanket under the guy's chin and asked, "Are you
comfortable?"

The man said...

See his complete answer on 'T&H's blog!!!

*Please see blog "comments" for additional information if you like:O)

� Email to a friend �

Read My Eulogy

� Email to a friend �

UNC Funeral

A traveller was passing through Chapel
Hill when he came upon a huge funeral
procession.

"Who died?" he asked a nearby UNC student.

"I'm not sure," replied the student, "
but...

See his complete answer on 'T&H's blog!!!

� Email to a friend �

Word Match Game

Match the words in the left-hand column
with the correct definition in the right-hand
column. The answers are located for you in
blog "comments"...

1. obnubilate ...... A. Dull, gloomy speech
2. perorate ......... B. To deny or dispute
3. descry ............. C. Something knowable
4. gainsay ........... D. To finish a speech by summarizing its main points
5. inveterate ....... E. Being beyond consolation
6. tristiloquy ....... F. To cloud, obscure
7. disconsolate .... G. Having a changeable iridescent luster
8. chatoyant ....... H. Firmly established by long persistence
9. nostrum .......... I. To catch sight of
10. scibile .......... J. A usually questionable remedy or scheme

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Thursday's Riddles

1) What is one thing that is lighter
when it's full, but heavier when
it's empty?

2) I am neither inside the house,
nor outside the house.
Clearly you can see through my little charade,
because no house seems complete without me.
What am I?

The image �http://www.arvato-systems.co.uk/page/_img/cnt_woman7.jpg� cannot be displayed, because it contains errors.

The image �http://www.arvato-systems.co.uk/page/_img/cnt_woman7.jpg� cannot be displayed, because it contains errors.

3) Without a partner, I sit here mutely,
My grace and beauty for you to reckon.
Bright head above a regal neck, soft curves,
And promise of my rich voice do beckon.

I'm inevitably hollow, the fretful type,
But with practice, I could be your soul mate:
If you hold me just right, I'll resonate your spirit
In faultless pitch, your song to elevate.

4) While I am in air, I am not in oxygen.
I am also in water, but not in hydrogen.
I am necessary in all animals,
but you won't find me in the zoo.
Look in all brains and you'll find me there too.
What am I?

http://www.utsa.edu/today/images/computers/kiosk2.jpg

5) What unusual property do the words FLOUR, TERN,
and THIRSTY have in common?

6) My first three letters are a term in golf,
While my second, third, and fourth are drawings.
My first four are less than a whole,
And all of me is a celebration.
What am I?

http://strategis.ic.gc.ca/epic/internet/inad-ad.nsf/vwimages/woman1.jpg/$file/woman1.jpg

7) Though my beauty is becoming,
I can hurt you just the same.
I come in many colors.
You will always know my name.
Some love me for one reason.
Some may dislike me just as well.
More than one of any color of me
will surely always sell.
What Am I?

*You may find the answers in blog "comments" if you like...

The image �http://www.adelphia.com/high_speed_internet/_images/woman_portrait_laptop.jpg� cannot be displayed, because it contains errors.

The image �http://www.adelphia.com/high_speed_internet/_images/woman_portrait_laptop.jpg� cannot be displayed, because it contains errors.

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Why You Matter So Much
To The People You Know

You sit there, staring at the phone for forty-five minutes.
There's this girl you really want to ask out, but every time
you try to pick up the phone to call her, you freeze. Finally,
you realize she probably isn't going to call you, and the phone
isn't going to call her all by itself. You start to punch in her
number. Are you still afraid? Yes. But courage is not the
absence of fear, it's the disregard of it! So here goes!

MORE!!!

LISTEN!!!

http://www.lib.monash.edu.au/assets/images/news/2005/02-newguidelines.gif

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Poll Position

The image
�http://www.internetmultimedia.com.mx/images/race_start.jpg� cannot be displayed, because it contains errors.

Universal belief in a Supreme Being is still as persistent as
ever. A worldwide poll taken in 1991 has the global figure
for atheists at just 4.4 percent. Another category titled
"other non-religious" added a further 16.4 percent
(agnostics in the "don't know" camp probably account
for most of these). This leaves nearly 80 percent of the
world's population professing belief in some sort of God.

MORE!!!

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Our Blog Readers Snapshot

Num	Perc.	Country Name
65	71.43%	United States
5	5.49%	Canada
4	4.40%	Australia
3	3.30%	Lebanon
3	3.30%	Unknown	-
2	2.20%	Finland
2	2.20%	Singapore
2	2.20%	Belgium
2	2.20%	France
1	1.10%	Malaysia
1	1.10%	Philippines
1	1.10%	India

� Email to a friend �

from "'Thought & Humor'
...by Dr. Howdy"

Do you need some humor in your life???

Great Thought, Riddles, Videos
& Award Winning Humor w/o
commercial advertisements...

Updated daily!!!

***Turn up your speaker***

More MUSIC options

at bottom of blog!!!

Send instant messages to your online friends http://au.messenger.yahoo.com

#472

From: "***Dr. Howdy***" <hello_myfriend2day@...>
Date: Mon Oct 30, 2006 3:27 pm
Subject: 'Thought & Humor' - ...by Dr. Howdy - 3 new articles - 10.30.6

hello_myfriend2day@...

'Thought & Humor'
...by Dr. Howdy - 3 new articles

New Company Policy

� Email to a friend �

Dr. Howdy On The Way To Work

� Email to a friend �

Communing With The Dead

Ghosts, goblins and ghouls are the stuff
of Halloween legends and costumes, but
are they real???

MORE!!!

*Please see blog "comments" also...

� Email to a friend �

from "'Thought & Humor'
...by Dr. Howdy"

Do you need some corny humor in your life???

Great Thought, Riddles, Videos
& Award Winning Humor w/o
commercial advertisements...

Updated daily!!!

***Turn up your speaker***

More MUSIC options

at bottom of blog!!!

Send instant messages to your online friends http://au.messenger.yahoo.com

#473

From: ***Professor Howdy*** <professor_conviviality@...>
Date: Mon Oct 30, 2006 5:51 pm
Subject: 'Thought & Humor' - ...by Dr. Howdy - Time To Resign - Guest Op-Ed Editorial - 10.30.6

professor_conviviality@...

'Thought & Humor'
...by Dr. Howdy - 1 new article

Time To Resign
Guest Op-Ed Editorial

When Congressman Mark Foley sent those dastardly
e-mail letters to House Pages, many (who are much
wiser than I) called for the Head Majority Leader in
the House - Rep. Denny Hastert - to resign along with
Congressman Foley.

In light of this new policy and in view of the anti-women
and anti-family viewpoints in the Virginia Senatorial race
(Jim Webb vs. George Allen) by Democrat Jim Web,
I would like to request - no demand - that Nancy Pelosi
and Senator Harry Reed resign immediately along with
any member of their party that was aware of such scandalous
novels by Democrat Jim Web.

Investigations and congressional hearings should also
start within 3 days. This is not a Party issue (Democrat
vs. G.O.P.) nor a conservative vs. liberal issue but
a precedent set by Mark Foley (who resigned and
immediately began counseling), C.N.N., C.B.S., A.B.C.,
N.B.C., The New York Times, The Washington Post
and others.

Dr. Ive Hadenough

� Your Comments Welcome �

from "'Thought & Humor'
...by Dr. Howdy"

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at bottom of blog!!!

Do you need some humor in your life???

Great Thought, Riddles, Videos
& Award Winning Humor w/o
commercial advertisements...

Updated daily!!!

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#474

From: ***Professor Howdy*** <award_winning_enewspaper@...>
Date: Tue Oct 31, 2006 2:43 pm
Subject: ***Thought & Humor*** - October 31, 2006 A.D. - Martin Luther changed the course of history on this date - 1517 - The most important event in history since Biblical times...

award_winning_enewspaper@...

Welcome to:

'Thought & Humor'

by Howdy

A UNC grad stood on the side of the road hitch

hiking on a very dark night in the middle of a storm.

The thunder was rolling and no cars passed. The
storm was so strong, he could hardly see a few

feet ahead of him. Suddenly he saw a car come

towards him and stop.

The man, without thinking about it, got in the car

and closed the door to realize that nobody was

behind the wheel...

TheRestOfTheStory!!!

http://dr-whoami.blogspot.com/

Updated frequently during the day!!!

************************

Be sure & read the "Comments" after each blog joke -

there's more funny stuff & letters from y'all...

Write me sometime: http://write-howdy.blogspot.com/

************************

Two foreign exchange students at UNC* are

at a restroom, one is entering and the other

is leaving. What are their nationalities???

http://dr-whoami.blogspot.com/

*Permission is hereby granted for you to change all
humor used in The"E-Mail Newspaper", 'Thought

7) It is against international law to transmute any jocoseness

found in this newspaper to any school if their mascot is the Wolfpack.

If attempts are made, your computer will automatically notify the

FBI, CIA, and the KGB and you will be charged with...

"performing an illegal operation".

***********************

Check out this Blog:

http://dr-whoami.blogspot.com/

Updated frequently!!!

===============

Take the best medicine of all for what ails you -- laughter:

"A person without a sense of humor is like a wagon

===============

===============



Four important things to KNOW:

1) For ALL (Americans, Muslims, Jews, Catholics, Hindus,

Buddhist, Asians, Presbyterians, Europeans, Baptist,

Brazilians, Mormons, Methodist, French, etc.) have sinned

& fall short of the glory of God.

2) For the wages of above (see #1) are DEATH (Hell, eternal

separation from God, & damnation) but the Gift (free & at

no charge to you) of God (Creator, Jehovah, & Trinity) is

Eternal Life (Heaven) through (in union with) Jesus Christ

(God, Lord, 2nd Person of The Trinity, Messiah, Prince of

Peace & Savior of the World).

3) For God so greatly loved & dearly prized the world

(Americans, Muslims, Jews, Catholics, Hindus, Buddhist,

Asians, Presbyterians, Europeans, Baptist, Brazilians,

Mormons, Methodist, French, etc.) that He even gave up

His only begotten (unique) Son, that whosoever (anyone,

anywhere, anytime - while still living) believes (trust in,

relies on, clings to, depends completely on) Him shall

have eternal (everlasting) life (heaven).

4) Jesus said: "I am THE WAY, THE TRUTH, & THE LIFE.

No one (male/female - American, Muslim, Jew, Catholic,

Hindu, Buddhist, Asian, Presbyterian, European, Baptist,

Brazilian, Mormons, Methodist, French, etc. ) comes (arrives)

to the Father (with GOD in Heaven) EXCEPT BY (through)

ME (no other name).

This wonderful loving GOD gives you the choice - - -
(Rev. 3:20)

{Please note that church membership, baptism, doing good

things, etc. are not requirements for becoming a Christian -

however they are great afterwards!!!}

Jesus said, "Wide is the gate and broad is the road that

leads to destruction (Hell, damnation, eternal punishment),

and many enter through it. But small is the gate and narrow

the road that leads to life (Heaven, eternal happiness,
forever with God), and only a few find it. --Matthew 7:13-14

++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

The "E-Mail Newspaper" containing 'Thought & Humor'

is sent out FREE via e-mail w/o ads. This information

was sent to you because you made the request, 'Thought

& Humor' is one small attempt to obey "The Great* Com-

Quoting one is plagiarism; quoting many is research.

'Thought & Humor' respects your privacy and wishes to honor

your desires to not receive e-mail from us if that's your choice,

and we apologize if any message causes any inconvenience

to you or your computer. We have never given any reader's

e-mail addresses to a third party & have no plans to do such

unless the price is right:o) (Liberals please note - that was

humor) The E-Mail Newspaper is sent to you with love.

But indeed for this purpose I have raised you up,
that I may show My power in you, and that My
Name may be declared in all the earth. Ex 9:16

===============

EMAIL ATTACHMENTS / VIRUSES

Howdy will never send an email with attachments.

If you receive an e-mail that appears to be from

Howdy but has attachments, it was most likely

generated from a computer outside of 'T & H'

by a virus.

===============

'Thought & Humor' has been read in all 50 States,

230 Countries, 7 Continents, many Island Nations,
Oxford, Cambridge, every Ivy League School
& all major American Universities including UNC!!!

===============

Board of Advisors for 'Thought & Humor':

Did you know that 'Thought & Humor' has a distinguished Board of Advisors

that are designed to be a cross section demographically of our readership as far

as age, location, gender, marital status, education & occupation are concerned???

Bill J. - 60's - Fed. Government Employee

Bill R. - 50's - FL - Computer Operator for 911 System

Bill T. - 50's - MN - College Professor

Bob - 80's - FL - Semi - Retired Military Chaplan/Minister - D.D.

Brenda - 50's - TX - University Administor, Married

Caroline - 20's - FL - Married, Elementary School Teacher - H.B. July 22

Cindy - 40's - NC - 501(c)(3) Administrator - Married

Doug - 50's - TN - President of 501(c)(3) Corp, Married

Ellen - 20's - NJ - Registered Nurse - Married

Emily - 30's - TN - Banker, Married

Janet - 40's - MI - Married, Former Missionary to Arab Country

Jill - 50's - MN - Restaurant Owner, Married

John - 50's - Peru - Pastor, Married

Judith - 60's - TX - Retired Teacher

Katie - 20's - NC - Teacher, Married to UNC Med Student - H.B. July 28

Lee - 20's - GA - College Student

Les - 40's - Australia - Pilot

Lisa - 40's - TN - Secretary, Married

Marie - 60's - South Africa - Entrepreneur, Politician

Mamie - 30's - GA - Elementary Teacher

Patricia - 20's - MX - Entrepreneur, Politician

Phil - 50's WI - Disabled

Rob - 20's - NY - University Administor, Married

Ruth - 50's - CA - Real Estate, Involved in Spanish Ministry

Sarah - 20's - NC - UNC Student, Married

Tom - 40's - Middle East - Missionary

Shirl - 60's - CO - Finance Manager - Married to Minister

Teresa - 30's - NC - Mother

Wanda - 40's - Asia - Married - Communist Country

Advisory meetings are held weekly via the internet

and none receive monetary/pecuniary compensation

for their extensive/capacious/voluminous expertise.

===============

Dear Friends,

Goodbye for now with jocundness for both you

& your dynasty & an enkindling autumn pulchritude!!!

Your Amigo, Confrere & Sidekick,
Howdy
(probably spurious)

P.S. Before I can retaliate, does someone first have to taliate?

===============

How to UNSUBSCRIBE

& make poor Howdy Cry:

Go Here: http://write-howdy.blogspot.com/

Warning: Unsubscribing could restrict one's opportunities for

ascertaining uninterrupted existence for same's quintessence.

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

(You are receiving this e-mail because it has been reported to

us by a close associate of yours that you are in dire need of

jocularity/ludicrousness. If you feel that this is not the case

and that you might have received this missive/memorandum

in error, please disregard or send back to your professor/colleague.

Thank you!)

>>> Share the good news <<<
Please forward this newspaper to a friend!

But indeed for this purpose I have raised you up,
that I may show My power in you, and that My
Name may be declared in all the earth. Ex 9:16

Send instant messages to your online friends http://uk.messenger.yahoo.com

#475

From: ***Professor Howdy*** <unc_girls_are_silly@...>
Date: Tue Oct 31, 2006 5:24 pm
Subject: 'Thought & Humor' - ...by Dr. Howdy - 12 new articles - Oct 31, 2006 A.D.

unc_girls_are_silly@...

'Thought & Humor'
...by Dr. Howdy - 12 new articles

Dinner Date

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Monday's Riddles

The image �http://www.books4you.addr.com/int_chinese_woman_long_hair.jpg� cannot
be displayed, because it contains errors.

1) Other than being colors, what do the words orange,
silver and purple have in common?

2) When Jacob's sons made a second trip to Egypt, what
food did they bring with them as a gift for Joseph?

http://www.northparkcenter.com/resources/d/woman_computer_s.jpg

3) Pronounced as one letter,
And written with three,
Two letters there are,
And two only in me.
I'm double, I'm single,
I'm black blue and grey,
I'm read from both ends,
And the same either way.

http://www.compbase.com/img/woman_computer.jpg

4)
a. Who prayed for a drought?
b. Who prayed for a drink of water?
c. Who prayed for a son?

*Answers located in blog "comments"

http://www.prio.com/pix/consumers/lens_woman.jpg

� Email to a friend �

Vet Visit

A man brought a limp dog into the Veterinary
Clinic. As he lay the dog on the table, the
doctor pulled out her stethoscope, placing it
on the dog's chest.

After a moment or two, the Vet shook her head
sadly and said, "I'm sorry, sir but your dog
has passed away."

"What?" screamed the man. "How can you tell? You
haven't done any testing on him or anything. I
want another opinion!"

With that, the Vet turned and left the room. In
a few moments, she returned with a Labrador Retriever.

The Retriever went right to work, checking the
poor dead dog out thoroughly. After a considerable
amount of sniffing, the Retriever sadly shook his
head and barked, "Woof! Woof!".

The Veterinarian then took the Labrador out and
returned in a few moments with a cat, who also
checked out the poor dog on the table. As had
his predecessor, the cat sadly shook his head and
went, "Miaow, Miaow."

He then jumped off the table and ran out of the room.
The Veterinarian handed the man a bill for $600...

The dog's owner went ballistic.

"$600! Just to tell me my dog is dead? This is
outrageous!"

Again, the Vet shook her head sadly and explained,
"If you had taken my word for it, it would have only
been $50, but no, you wanted testing... So with the
Lab Work and the Cat Scan..."

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OBSCURE & UNUSUAL WORDS

http://gilmourpromotions.com/rumrunnersretreat/window-view.jpg

1) scuddick skud ik (noun)
: something small in size or value

2) periclitation per ik li ta shen (noun)
: exposing to danger

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Physical Problems

http://www.generationscarechoice.com/Images/doctor%20patient.jpg

A UNC grad* was having some physical problems
and his doctor told him that he had to drink warm
water one hour before breakfast. At the end of a
week he returned and the doctor asked if he was
feeling better. The man said that he actually felt
worse.

"Did you drink warm water an hour before breakfast
each day?"

"No," replied the grad, "All I could do was about
15 minutes!"

*Please see blog "comments"

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A Letter To Friends

The image �http://www.bljinfo.com/photos/man-writing.jpg� cannot be displayed, because it contains errors.

Dear Friends,

For by Him all things were created that are in heaven
and that are in earth, visible and invisible, whether thrones
or dominions or principalities or powers. All things were
created through Him and for Him. And He is before all things,
and in Him all things consist.

Sicerely,
Paul

P.S. Please see blog "comments" for additional information.

� Email to a friend �

YOU CAN READ ALL ABOUT IT

Want to know what's going on?
Here you can read headlines
from around the world.

Read Headlines!!!

� Email to a friend �

UNC Football

� Email to a friend �

The Light Right
In Front Of You

http://www.stanice.com/uploaded_images/lighthouse-724974.jpg

There were 540 passengers aboard that September evening, sailing
from Athens to an Aegean Island. An hour out, the wind came up and
the temperature suddenly dropped. Five hours into the voyage, passengers
felt the ferry's engines surge, and most of them assumed they were getting
close to their destination. They were wrong. The crew was frantically trying
to steer clear of this small, rocky island, two miles from their destination.
Tragically, the ferry plowed right into those rocks. It took only 38 minutes
to sink. Rescue vessels got there quickly, but eighty people died that night,
and it did not have to happen. There was a functioning lighthouse, sitting
atop that rock, warning vessels away. It could be seen for several miles
around. For some reason, the ferry just kept heading straight for the rocks.

MORE!!!

HEAR!!!

� Email to a friend �

The Spinning Wheel

The image �http://www.jesuswalk.com/images/grindstone.jpg� cannot be displayed, because it contains errors.

Someone has said, "Life is a grindstone.
Whether it grinds us down or polishes
us up depends on the stuff we are made
of."

MORE!!!

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The Mayflower Compact

The image �http://www.pragmatism.org/american/mayflower.jpg� cannot be displayed, because it contains errors.

In just a few weeks, Americans will celebrate Thanksgiving,
a holiday that people of all faiths observe. But between stuffing
the turkey and watching football, we ought to make sure our
children and grandchildren understand the Christian roots of
this holiday, which are often downplayed in school...

MORE!!!

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Our Blog Readers Snapshot

Num	Perc.	Country Name
38	41.76%	United States
18	19.78%	Canada
7	7.69%	Philippines
6	6.59%	Mexico
4	4.40%	France
4	4.40%	United Kingdom
3	3.30%	Austria
2	2.20%	Thailand
2	2.20%	Saudi Arabia
2	2.20%	Singapore
2	2.20%	Australia
2	2.20%	Unknown	-
1	1.10%	Germany

� Email to a friend �

from "'Thought & Humor'
...by Dr. Howdy"

Do you need some corny humor in your life???

Great Thought, Riddles, Videos
& Award Winning Humor w/o
commercial advertisements...

Updated daily!!!

***Turn up your speaker***

More MUSIC options

at bottom of blog!!!

Send instant messages to your online friends http://au.messenger.yahoo.com

#476

From: *** Professor Howdy *** <humorthought2u@...>
Date: Wed Nov 1, 2006 2:08 pm
Subject: 'Thought & Humor' - ...by Dr. Howdy - 7 new articles - November 1, 2006

humorthought2u@...

'Thought & Humor'
...by Dr. Howdy - 7 new articles

It Was A Dark
And Foggy Night...

A UNC grad stood on the side of the road hitch hiking on
a very dark night in the middle of a storm. The thunder
was rolling and no cars passed. The storm was so strong,
he could hardly see a few feet ahead of him. Suddenly
he saw a car come towards him and stop.

The man, without thinking about it, got in the car and closed
the door to realize that nobody was behind the wheel. The car
started slowly. He looked at the road and saw a curve ahead.
Scared, he started praying, and begged for his life. He hadn't
come out of shock, when just before he hit the curve, a hand
appeared through the window and moved the wheel. The man,
paralyzed in terror, watched how the hand appeared every time
before a curve.

He gathered his strength, got out of the car and ran to the nearest
town. Wet and in shock, he ran into...

*The creepy climax to this story may be found in "comments".
Please do not allow this terrifying tale to fall into the hands of
children...

Football Cartoon

What Are Their Nationalities?

Q: Two foreign exchange students at UNC are at a restroom,
one is entering and the other is leaving. What are their nationalities?

A: Simple! The answer is in "comments" for your convenience!!!

A Word Of Advice

Tuesday's Riddles

The image �http://www.csus.edu/wrc/educational_programs/images/study.jpg� cannot be displayed, because it contains errors.

1) WHAT IS THE LONGEST WORD THAT
IS TYPED USING ONLY THE LEFT HAND
..................(IF YOU TYPE CORRECTLY)?

http://summer.oregonstate.edu/images/proprietary/students/MU-Woman.jpg

2) Forward I am heavy, backwards I am not.
What am I?

http://www.melanet.com/awg/images/wmstudy_lrg.jpg

3) Around the mill, there is a walk,
After the walk, there is a key.
What Am I?

The image �http://www.skidmore.edu/academics/asianstudies/new2/Student_Young_Asian_Woman_Studying_2.jpg� cannot be displayed, because it contains errors.

The image �http://www.skidmore.edu/academics/asianstudies/new2/Student_Young_Asian_Woman_Studying_2.jpg� cannot be displayed, because it contains errors.

4) This is a most unusual paragraph. How quickly
can you find out what is wrong with it? It's so usual,
you would think nothing is wrong with it. In fact, nothing
is wrong with it! It's unusual, though. Study it. What
is so unusual about it? Do you know?

*Answers may be found in blog "comments"

On This Date -
1517

The image
�http://chi.gospelcom.net/images/img_daily/10daily/1031witt.jpg� cannot be displayed, because it contains errors.

In the little town of Wittenberg, Germany,
on this day, October 31, 1517, no one seemed
to notice the priest nailing his challenge to debate
on the church door; but within the week, copies
of his theses would be discussed throughout the
surrounding regions; and within a decade, Europe
itself would be shaken by his simple act. Later
generations would mark martin Luther's nailing
of the 95 theses on the church door as the beginning
of the Protestant Reformation.

MORE!!!

Our Blog Readers Snapshot

Num	Perc.	Country Name
41	43.62%	United States
15	15.96%	Macao
10	10.64%	Israel
6	6.38%	Australia
5	5.32%	Poland
4	4.26%	Canada
4	4.26%	Unknown	-
2	2.13%	Bulgaria
2	2.13%	Saudi Arabia
1	1.06%	United Kingdom
1	1.06%	Denmark
1	1.06%	United Arab Emirates
1	1.06%	Egypt
1	1.06%	Sweden

from "'Thought & Humor'
...by Dr. Howdy"

Do you need some corny humor in your life???

Great Thought, Riddles, Videos
& Award Winning Humor w/o
commercial advertisements...

Updated daily!!!

***Turn up your speaker***

More MUSIC options

at bottom of blog!!!

Send instant messages to your online friends http://au.messenger.yahoo.com

#477

From: ***Professor Howdy*** <professor_tom_foolery@...>
Date: Wed Nov 1, 2006 4:18 pm
Subject: ***Thought & Humor*** - November 1, 2006 A.D. - A professor is one who talks in someone else's sleep.

professor_tom_foolery@...

Welcome to:

'Thought & Humor'

by Howdy

A cusomer in a restaurant next to the UNC

campus asked the student waitress if the roast

beef was rare.

The waitress gave the customer...

TheRestOfTheStory!!!

http://dr-whoami.blogspot.com/

Updated frequently during the day!!!

************************

Be sure & read the "Comments" after each blog joke -

there's more funny stuff & letters from y'all...

Write me sometime: http://write-howdy.blogspot.com/

************************

The MSU graduate with a Science degree asks...

The GT graduate with an Engineering degree asks...

The Villanova graduate with an Accounting degree asks...

A UNC* graduate with an Arts degree asks...

http://dr-whoami.blogspot.com/

*Permission is hereby granted for you to change all
humor used in The"E-Mail Newspaper", 'Thought

7) It is against international law to transmute any jocoseness

found in this newspaper to any school if their mascot is the Wolfpack.

If attempts are made, your computer will automatically notify the

FBI, CIA, and the KGB and you will be charged with...

"performing an illegal operation".

***********************

Check out this Blog:

http://dr-whoami.blogspot.com/

Updated frequently!!!

===============

Take the best medicine of all for what ails you -- laughter:

"A person without a sense of humor is like a wagon

===============

===============



Four important things to KNOW:

1) For ALL (Americans, Muslims, Jews, Catholics, Hindus,

Buddhist, Asians, Presbyterians, Europeans, Baptist,

Brazilians, Mormons, Methodist, French, etc.) have sinned

& fall short of the glory of God.

2) For the wages of above (see #1) are DEATH (Hell, eternal

separation from God, & damnation) but the Gift (free & at

no charge to you) of God (Creator, Jehovah, & Trinity) is

Eternal Life (Heaven) through (in union with) Jesus Christ

(God, Lord, 2nd Person of The Trinity, Messiah, Prince of

Peace & Savior of the World).

3) For God so greatly loved & dearly prized the world

(Americans, Muslims, Jews, Catholics, Hindus, Buddhist,

Asians, Presbyterians, Europeans, Baptist, Brazilians,

Mormons, Methodist, French, etc.) that He even gave up

His only begotten (unique) Son, that whosoever (anyone,

anywhere, anytime - while still living) believes (trust in,

relies on, clings to, depends completely on) Him shall

have eternal (everlasting) life (heaven).

4) Jesus said: "I am THE WAY, THE TRUTH, & THE LIFE.

No one (male/female - American, Muslim, Jew, Catholic,

Hindu, Buddhist, Asian, Presbyterian, European, Baptist,

Brazilian, Mormons, Methodist, French, etc. ) comes (arrives)

to the Father (with GOD in Heaven) EXCEPT BY (through)

ME (no other name).

This wonderful loving GOD gives you the choice - - -
(Rev. 3:20)

{Please note that church membership, baptism, doing good

things, etc. are not requirements for becoming a Christian -

however they are great afterwards!!!}

Jesus said, "Wide is the gate and broad is the road that

leads to destruction (Hell, damnation, eternal punishment),

and many enter through it. But small is the gate and narrow

the road that leads to life (Heaven, eternal happiness,
forever with God), and only a few find it. --Matthew 7:13-14

++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

The "E-Mail Newspaper" containing 'Thought & Humor'

is sent out FREE via e-mail w/o ads. This information

was sent to you because you made the request, 'Thought

& Humor' is one small attempt to obey "The Great* Com-

Quoting one is plagiarism; quoting many is research.

'Thought & Humor' respects your privacy and wishes to honor

your desires to not receive e-mail from us if that's your choice,

and we apologize if any message causes any inconvenience

to you or your computer. We have never given any reader's

e-mail addresses to a third party & have no plans to do such

unless the price is right:o) (Liberals please note - that was

humor) The E-Mail Newspaper is sent to you with love.

But indeed for this purpose I have raised you up,
that I may show My power in you, and that My
Name may be declared in all the earth. Ex 9:16

===============

EMAIL ATTACHMENTS / VIRUSES

Howdy will never send an email with attachments.

If you receive an e-mail that appears to be from

Howdy but has attachments, it was most likely

generated from a computer outside of 'T & H'

by a virus.

===============

'Thought & Humor' has been read in all 50 States,

230 Countries, 7 Continents, many Island Nations,
Oxford, Cambridge, every Ivy League School
& all major American Universities including UNC!!!

===============

Board of Advisors for 'Thought & Humor':

Did you know that 'Thought & Humor' has a distinguished Board of Advisors

that are designed to be a cross section demographically of our readership as far

as age, location, gender, marital status, education & occupation are concerned???

Bill J. - 60's - Fed. Government Employee

Bill R. - 50's - FL - Computer Operator for 911 System

Bill T. - 50's - MN - College Professor

Bob - 80's - FL - Semi - Retired Military Chaplan/Minister - D.D.

Brenda - 50's - TX - University Administor, Married

Caroline - 20's - FL - Married, Elementary School Teacher - H.B. July 22

Cindy - 40's - NC - 501(c)(3) Administrator - Married

Doug - 50's - TN - President of 501(c)(3) Corp, Married

Ellen - 20's - NJ - Registered Nurse - Married

Emily - 30's - TN - Banker, Married

Janet - 40's - MI - Married, Former Missionary to Arab Country

Jill - 50's - MN - Restaurant Owner, Married

John - 50's - Peru - Pastor, Married

Judith - 60's - TX - Retired Teacher

Katie - 20's - NC - Teacher, Married to UNC Med Student - H.B. July 28

Lee - 20's - GA - College Student

Les - 40's - Australia - Pilot

Lisa - 40's - TN - Secretary, Married

Marie - 60's - South Africa - Entrepreneur, Politician

Mamie - 30's - GA - Elementary Teacher

Patricia - 20's - MX - Entrepreneur, Politician

Phil - 50's WI - Disabled

Rob - 20's - NY - University Administor, Married

Ruth - 50's - CA - Real Estate, Involved in Spanish Ministry

Sarah - 20's - NC - UNC Student, Married

Tom - 40's - Middle East - Missionary

Shirl - 60's - CO - Finance Manager - Married to Minister

Teresa - 30's - NC - Mother

Wanda - 40's - Asia - Married - Communist Country

Advisory meetings are held weekly via the internet

and none receive monetary/pecuniary compensation

for their extensive/capacious/voluminous expertise.

===============

Dear Friends,

Goodbye for now with jocundness for both you

& your dynasty & an enkindling autumn pulchritude!!!

Your Amigo, Confrere & Sidekick,
Howdy
(probably spurious)

P.S. A programmer is someone who solves a problem you

didn't know you had in a way you don't understand.

===============

How to UNSUBSCRIBE

& make poor Howdy Cry:

Go Here: http://write-howdy.blogspot.com/

Warning: Unsubscribing could restrict one's opportunities for

ascertaining uninterrupted existence for same's quintessence.

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

(You are receiving this e-mail because it has been reported to

us by a close associate of yours that you are in dire need of

jocularity/ludicrousness. If you feel that this is not the case

and that you might have received this missive/memorandum

in error, please disregard or send back to your professor/colleague.

Thank you!)

>>> Share the good news <<<
Please forward this newspaper to a friend!

But indeed for this purpose I have raised you up,
that I may show My power in you, and that My
Name may be declared in all the earth. Ex 9:16

We have the perfect Group for you. Check out the handy changes to Yahoo! Groups.

#478

From: "***Dr. Howdy***" <the_ludicrousness_prof@...>
Date: Thu Nov 2, 2006 4:17 pm
Subject: 'Thought & Humor' - Great Articles About "The Kiss!", "Being Traded", " WACKY IN KHAKI", " Retirement Farming", & Much More - 11.2.6

the_ludicrousness_prof@...

'Thought & Humor'
...by Dr. Howdy - 9 new articles

Pay-Per-View

UNC Restaurant

The image �http://www.ibiblio.org/finedine/images/places/vespa/vespaa.jpg� cannot be displayed, because it contains errors.

A cusomer in a restaurant next to the UNC* campus
asked the student waitress if the roast beef was rare.

The waitress gave the customer a stare and replied,
"Well, no. We have it, like, just about every day."

*Please see blog "comments" for explanation.

Watch Out!!!

Thursday's Riddles

The image �http://www.simplesystemsmonterey.com/images/developer-woman.jpg� cannot be displayed, because it contains errors.

1) Without looking at a calendar, within a minute name
a boy's name using 5 consecutive 1st letters of 5
consecutive months.

The image �http://media.venda.com/ntlhome/ebiz/ntlhome/images/photo_retail.jpg� cannot be displayed, because it contains errors.

2) My first is a number, my second another,
And each, I assure you, will rhyme with the other.
My first you will find is one-fifth of my second,
And truely my whole a long period reckoned.
Yet my first and my second, (nay, think not I cozen),
When added together will make but two dozen.
How many am I?

http://www.monroecounty.gov/i/health-HealthWeb.jpg

3) A man took his horse to the emergency room. The vet
decided to operate on the poor animal immediately. He told
the man that whether the animal died during the operation
or survived, he would charge $500. The horse did not
survive the operation and the man did not pay anything.
Why not?

*Answers may be found in blog "comments"

College Grads

The MSU graduate with a Science degree asks,
"Why does it work?"

The GT graduate with an Engineering degree asks,
"How does it work?"

The Villanova graduate with an Accounting degree asks,
"How much will it cost?"

http://us.inmagine.com/168nwm/stockdisc/sd175/258131sdc.jpg

A UNC graduate with an Arts degree asks,
"Do you want fries with that?"

Dear Howdy

The image �http://www.g3iso.com/images/woman%20writing.jpg� cannot be displayed, because it contains errors.

Dear Howdy,

Did Anyone ever tell you,
Just how special You are?
The light that You emit
Might even light a star?

Did Anyone ever tell You
How important You make Others feel?
Somebody out there is smiling
About Love that is so real?

Did Anyone ever tell You
Many times, when They were sad,
Your blog made Them smile a bit
In fact It made them glad?

For the time You spend sending things
And sharing whatever You find,
There are no words to thank You
But Somebody thinks You're fine.

Did Anyone ever tell You
Just how much They love You?
Well, My Dearest "Online" Friend,
Today I am telling YOU!

Have a blessed day, my special blog friend!
Jan

VIRUS ALERT!

http://www.topics-mag.com/edition15/images-happen/maria1.jpg

VIRUS ALERT!

TO: ALLUSERS
SUBJECT: VIRUS ALERT!

There is a very dangerous virus going around and it is
propogated through the email system. If you get an email
message with the subject: "VIRUS ALERT!" do not open the
mail message. If you do, the virus scrambles the second
half of every text file on your system.

VERY IMPORTANT: If you do get this virus, the first thing
dlkfjaid dfdjas nairb gfdq40wt yaj asdfsdg dluog av da
agj asdfajpg as dflasidffnm asd difvu asdfa vgoiae vdsofj
we dasdf 9efm sd dag0 g adf as dg 0vbwe ads gwefawe ads
vewerwe dsf!

(Send this warning to everyone you know by clicking on the little white

envelope on the blog just below that has an arrow pointing to the right.)

Using Steroids

Our Blog Readers Snapshot

from "'Thought & Humor'
...by Dr. Howdy"

Do you need some corny humor in your life???

Great Thought, Riddles, Videos
& Award Winning Humor w/o
commercial advertisements...

Updated daily!!!

***Turn up your speaker***

More MUSIC options

at bottom of blog!!!

Send instant messages to your online friends http://asia.messenger.yahoo.com

#479

From: ***Professor Howdy*** <professor_ludicrous@...>
Date: Fri Nov 3, 2006 1:15 pm
Subject: 'Thought & Humor' - ...by Dr. Howdy - 10 new articles - 11.3.6

professor_ludicrous@...

'Thought & Humor'
...by Dr. Howdy - 10 new articles

Kiss On A Train

http://www.cyclehire.co.nz/images/brunner.jpg

A young Technician and his General Manager board
a train headed through the mountains on its way to
Wichita. They can find no place to sit except for two
seats right across the aisle from a young woman and
her grandmother.

After a while, it is obvious that the young woman
and the young tech are interested in each other,
because they are giving each other looks.

Soon the train passes into a tunnel and it is pitch
black. There is a sound of a kiss followed by the
sound of a slap. When the train emerges from the
tunnel, the four sit there without saying a word.

The grandmother is thinking to herself, "It was
very brash for that young man to kiss my grand -
daughter, but I'm glad she slapped him."

The General manager is setting there thinking,
"I didn't know the young tech was brave enough
to kiss the girl, but I sure wish she hadn't missed
him when she slapped and hit me!"

The young woman was sitting and thinking,
"I'm glad the guy kissed me, but I wish my
grandmother had not slapped him!"

Find out what happened...

HERE!!!

Being Traded

WACKY IN KHAKI

Retirement Farming

The image
�http://www.charlestowncooperativefarm.org/The%20Farm/Crops-Growing-in-the-sun.jpg� cannot be displayed, because it contains errors.

A detective who spent his entire career in plain
clothes quit the police force and bought a farm.

"What kind of crops do you plan to grow?"
the police chief asked the farmer-to-be.

"Carrots and potatoes," the man replied.

"Why carrots and potatoes?" asked the chief.

"Because," answered the ex-detective, . . .
Find out what happened...

HERE!!!

Friday Riddles
(For You & Your Friends)

The image �http://www.carefirst.com/company/ar2005/images/COUCH_wendy.jpg� cannot be displayed, because it contains errors.

1) "I know a word of letters three,
add two and fewer there will be."
So, what's the word?

http://images.meredith.com/bhg/images/01/m_FAM900765.jpg

2) What is so fragile that when you say its
name you break it?

The image �http://images.asme.org/Universal/People/Diversity/4459.jpg� cannot be displayed, because it contains errors.

3) The first is foremost legally
The second circles outwardly
The third leeds in victory
The last twice ends a nominee
What am I?

http://www.acbuk.net/media/img_right.jpg

4) Count the number of "F"'s in the following text:

FINISHED FILES ARE THE RESULT OF YEARS OF SCIENTIFIC
STUDY COMBINED WITH THE EXPERIENCE OF YEARS.

Got it?

*Answers are located in blog "comments"

UNC Up North

A UNC football player was visiting a Yankee relative
in Boston over the holidays. He went to a large party
and met a pretty co-ed. He was attempting to start
up a conversation with the line, "Where do you go
to school?"

"Yale," she replied.

The UNC student took a big, deep breath and shouted,
Find out what he said...

HERE!!!

http://www.mediaspacesolutions.com/images04/Photos/Photo_WomanSurprised.jpg

On a recent...

The image �http://www.jcbcon.net/transportation/images/airplane_window.jpg� cannot be displayed, because it contains errors.

On a recent flight, a UNC* grad kept peering out the window.
Since it was totally dark, all she could see was the blinking
wing-tip light. Finally, she rang for the flight attendant.

"I'm sorry to bother you," she said, "but...

Find out what she said...

HERE!!!

*Please see blog "comments" for additional information.

You Get It Ready

Years ago, we were associated with a ministry that was able
to acquire a rambling old home for its offices. It was a great
help and a lot of work to get it in shape. Thankfully, lots of
friends pitched in with some volunteer help. So we were able
to move in, but one big job remained. The outside still looked
a little shabby. And the problem was that our staff didn't have
the time or the ability or the equipment to do it right. Well,
along comes a Christian brother who is a painter. He has the
time, the ability, and the equipment. Here's what he said:
"I'll make you a deal. You get the paint, get some help, tape
up all the trim, and I'll do the rest." So he offered to do the
job on a simple basis: "You get it ready and I'll do the job."
Actually, I know someone else who works like that.

MORE!!!

HEAR!!!

The Wisdom Of God

The image �http://nescritas.nletras.com/poetsinenglish/fpessoaeng/archives/Sunlight%20Through%20Trees.jpg� cannot be displayed, because it contains errors.

Think of it--humiliation and agony. This was the path
Jesus chose with which to reach out for you and for me.
You see, this thing we call sin, but which we so tragically
minimize, breaks the grandeur for which we were created.
It brings indignity to our essence and pain to our existence.
It separates us from God...

MORE!!!

Our Blog Readers Snapshot

from "'Thought & Humor'
...by Dr. Howdy"

Do you need some corny humor in your life???

Great Thought, Riddles, Videos
& Award Winning Humor w/o
commercial advertisements...

Updated daily!!!

***Turn up your speaker***

More MUSIC options

at bottom of blog!!!

Send instant messages to your online friends http://au.messenger.yahoo.com

#480

From: "*** Dr. Jocular***" <dr_of_jocular@...>
Date: Fri Nov 3, 2006 3:48 pm
Subject: ***Thought & Humor*** - November 3, 2006 A.D. - Why do seagulls fly over the sea?

dr_of_jocular@...

Welcome to:

'Thought & Humor'

by Howdy

Why do seagulls fly over the sea???

TheRestOfTheStory!!!

http://dr-whoami.blogspot.com/

Updated frequently during the day!!!

************************

Be sure & read the "Comments" after each blog joke -

there's more funny stuff & letters from y'all...

Write me sometime: http://write-howdy.blogspot.com/

************************

A UNC* grad tells his psychiatrist,

"Doctor, I feel like a pair of curtains."

http://dr-whoami.blogspot.com/

*Permission is hereby granted for you to change all
humor used in The"E-Mail Newspaper", 'Thought

7) It is against international law to transmute any jocoseness

found in this newspaper to any school if their mascot is the Wolfpack.

If attempts are made, your computer will automatically notify the

FBI, CIA, and the KGB and you will be charged with...

"performing an illegal operation".

***********************

Check out this Blog:

http://dr-whoami.blogspot.com/

Updated frequently!!!

===============

Take the best medicine of all for what ails you -- laughter:

"A person without a sense of humor is like a wagon

===============

===============



Four important things to KNOW:

1) For ALL (Americans, Muslims, Jews, Catholics, Hindus,

Buddhist, Asians, Presbyterians, Europeans, Baptist,

Brazilians, Mormons, Methodist, French, etc.) have sinned

& fall short of the glory of God.

2) For the wages of above (see #1) are DEATH (Hell, eternal

separation from God, & damnation) but the Gift (free & at

no charge to you) of God (Creator, Jehovah, & Trinity) is

Eternal Life (Heaven) through (in union with) Jesus Christ

(God, Lord, 2nd Person of The Trinity, Messiah, Prince of

Peace & Savior of the World).

3) For God so greatly loved & dearly prized the world

(Americans, Muslims, Jews, Catholics, Hindus, Buddhist,

Asians, Presbyterians, Europeans, Baptist, Brazilians,

Mormons, Methodist, French, etc.) that He even gave up

His only begotten (unique) Son, that whosoever (anyone,

anywhere, anytime - while still living) believes (trust in,

relies on, clings to, depends completely on) Him shall

have eternal (everlasting) life (heaven).

4) Jesus said: "I am THE WAY, THE TRUTH, & THE LIFE.

No one (male/female - American, Muslim, Jew, Catholic,

Hindu, Buddhist, Asian, Presbyterian, European, Baptist,

Brazilian, Mormons, Methodist, French, etc. ) comes (arrives)

to the Father (with GOD in Heaven) EXCEPT BY (through)

ME (no other name).

This wonderful loving GOD gives you the choice - - -
(Rev. 3:20)

{Please note that church membership, baptism, doing good

things, etc. are not requirements for becoming a Christian -

however they are great afterwards!!!}

Jesus said, "Wide is the gate and broad is the road that

leads to destruction (Hell, damnation, eternal punishment),

and many enter through it. But small is the gate and narrow

the road that leads to life (Heaven, eternal happiness,
forever with God), and only a few find it. --Matthew 7:13-14

++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

The "E-Mail Newspaper" containing 'Thought & Humor'

is sent out FREE via e-mail w/o ads. This information

was sent to you because you made the request, 'Thought

& Humor' is one small attempt to obey "The Great* Com-

Quoting one is plagiarism; quoting many is research.

'Thought & Humor' respects your privacy and wishes to honor

your desires to not receive e-mail from us if that's your choice,

and we apologize if any message causes any inconvenience

to you or your computer. We have never given any reader's

e-mail addresses to a third party & have no plans to do such

unless the price is right:o) (Liberals please note - that was

humor) The E-Mail Newspaper is sent to you with love.

But indeed for this purpose I have raised you up,
that I may show My power in you, and that My
Name may be declared in all the earth. Ex 9:16

===============

EMAIL ATTACHMENTS / VIRUSES

Howdy will never send an email with attachments.

If you receive an e-mail that appears to be from

Howdy but has attachments, it was most likely

generated from a computer outside of 'T & H'

by a virus.

===============

'Thought & Humor' has been read in all 50 States,

230 Countries, 7 Continents, many Island Nations,
Oxford, Cambridge, every Ivy League School
& all major American Universities including UNC!!!

===============

Board of Advisors for 'Thought & Humor':

Did you know that 'Thought & Humor' has a distinguished Board of Advisors

that are designed to be a cross section demographically of our readership as far

as age, location, gender, marital status, education & occupation are concerned???

Bill J. - 60's - Fed. Government Employee

Bill R. - 50's - FL - Computer Operator for 911 System

Bill T. - 50's - MN - College Professor

Bob - 80's - FL - Semi - Retired Military Chaplan/Minister - D.D.

Brenda - 50's - TX - University Administor, Married

Caroline - 20's - FL - Married, Elementary School Teacher - H.B. July 22

Cindy - 40's - NC - 501(c)(3) Administrator - Married

Doug - 50's - TN - President of 501(c)(3) Corp, Married

Ellen - 20's - NJ - Registered Nurse - Married

Emily - 30's - TN - Banker, Married

Janet - 40's - MI - Married, Former Missionary to Arab Country

Jill - 50's - MN - Restaurant Owner, Married

John - 50's - Peru - Pastor, Married

Judith - 60's - TX - Retired Teacher

Katie - 20's - NC - Teacher, Married to UNC Med Student - H.B. July 28

Lee - 20's - GA - College Student

Les - 40's - Australia - Pilot

Lisa - 40's - TN - Secretary, Married

Marie - 60's - South Africa - Entrepreneur, Politician

Mamie - 30's - GA - Elementary Teacher

Patricia - 20's - MX - Entrepreneur, Politician

Phil - 50's WI - Disabled

Rob - 20's - NY - University Administor, Married

Ruth - 50's - CA - Real Estate, Involved in Spanish Ministry

Sarah - 20's - NC - UNC Student, Married

Tom - 40's - Middle East - Missionary

Shirl - 60's - CO - Finance Manager - Married to Minister

Teresa - 30's - NC - Mother

Wanda - 40's - Asia - Married - Communist Country

Advisory meetings are held weekly via the internet

and none receive monetary/pecuniary compensation

for their extensive/capacious/voluminous expertise.

===============

Dear Friends,

Goodbye for now with jocundness for both you

& your dynasty & an enkindling autumn pulchritude!!!

Your Amigo, Confrere & Sidekick,
Howdy
(probably spurious)

P.S. A statistician is someone who is good with numbers, but lacks the
personality to be an accountant.An actuary is someone who brings a fake

bomb on a plane because that decreases the chances that there will be another

bomb on the plane. (Laurence J. Peter) A programmer is someone who solves a problem

you didn't know you had in a way you don't understand. A mathematician is

a blind man in a dark room looking for a black cat which isn't there.A topologist

is a man who doesn't know the difference between a coffee cup and a doughnut.
A lawyer is a person who writes a 10,000-word document and calls it a "brief."

(Franz Kafka) A psychologist is a man who watches everyone else when a beautiful girl

enters the room.A professor is one who talks in someone else's sleep.A consultant

is someone who takes the watch off your wrist and tells you the time.

===============

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But indeed for this purpose I have raised you up,
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Name may be declared in all the earth. Ex 9:16

Send instant messages to your online friends http://au.messenger.yahoo.com

#481

From: ***Professor Howdy*** <unc_girls_are_silly@...>
Date: Tue Nov 7, 2006 2:10 pm
Subject: ***Thought & Humor*** - November 7, 2006 A.D. - Is it possible to be totally partial?

unc_girls_are_silly@...

http://thoughtnhumor.blogspot.com/2006/11/election-day.html

Do you like this election day humor???

Welcome to:

'Thought & Humor'

by Howdy

An efficiency expert concluded his lecture with

a note of caution. "You don't want to try these

techniques at home..."

TheRestOfTheStory!!!

http://dr-whoami.blogspot.com/

Updated frequently during the day!!!

************************

Be sure & read the "Comments" after each blog joke -

there's more funny stuff & letters from y'all...

Write me sometime: http://write-howdy.blogspot.com/

************************

A very large, old, building was being torn down

in Chapel Hill, N.C.* to make room for a new dorm.

While working on the 9th floor, two construction

workers found a skeleton in a small closet behind

the elevator shaft...

http://dr-whoami.blogspot.com/

*Permission is hereby granted for you to change all
humor used in The"E-Mail Newspaper", 'Thought

7) It is against international law to transmute any jocoseness

found in this newspaper to any school if their mascot is the Wolfpack.

If attempts are made, your computer will automatically notify the

FBI, CIA, and the KGB and you will be charged with...

"performing an illegal operation".

***********************

Check out this Blog:

http://dr-whoami.blogspot.com/

Updated frequently!!!

===============

Take the best medicine of all for what ails you -- laughter:

"A person without a sense of humor is like a wagon

===============

===============



Four important things to KNOW:

1) For ALL (Americans, Muslims, Jews, Catholics, Hindus,

Buddhist, Asians, Presbyterians, Europeans, Baptist,

Brazilians, Mormons, Methodist, French, etc.) have sinned

& fall short of the glory of God.

2) For the wages of above (see #1) are DEATH (Hell, eternal

separation from God, & damnation) but the Gift (free & at

no charge to you) of God (Creator, Jehovah, & Trinity) is

Eternal Life (Heaven) through (in union with) Jesus Christ

(God, Lord, 2nd Person of The Trinity, Messiah, Prince of

Peace & Savior of the World).

3) For God so greatly loved & dearly prized the world

(Americans, Muslims, Jews, Catholics, Hindus, Buddhist,

Asians, Presbyterians, Europeans, Baptist, Brazilians,

Mormons, Methodist, French, etc.) that He even gave up

His only begotten (unique) Son, that whosoever (anyone,

anywhere, anytime - while still living) believes (trust in,

relies on, clings to, depends completely on) Him shall

have eternal (everlasting) life (heaven).

4) Jesus said: "I am THE WAY, THE TRUTH, & THE LIFE.

No one (male/female - American, Muslim, Jew, Catholic,

Hindu, Buddhist, Asian, Presbyterian, European, Baptist,

Brazilian, Mormons, Methodist, French, etc. ) comes (arrives)

to the Father (with GOD in Heaven) EXCEPT BY (through)

ME (no other name).

This wonderful loving GOD gives you the choice - - -
(Rev. 3:20)

{Please note that church membership, baptism, doing good

things, etc. are not requirements for becoming a Christian -

however they are great afterwards!!!}

Jesus said, "Wide is the gate and broad is the road that

leads to destruction (Hell, damnation, eternal punishment),

and many enter through it. But small is the gate and narrow

the road that leads to life (Heaven, eternal happiness,
forever with God), and only a few find it. --Matthew 7:13-14

++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

The "E-Mail Newspaper" containing 'Thought & Humor'

is sent out FREE via e-mail w/o ads. This information

was sent to you because you made the request, 'Thought

& Humor' is one small attempt to obey "The Great* Com-

Quoting one is plagiarism; quoting many is research.

'Thought & Humor' respects your privacy and wishes to honor

your desires to not receive e-mail from us if that's your choice,

and we apologize if any message causes any inconvenience

to you or your computer. We have never given any reader's

e-mail addresses to a third party & have no plans to do such

unless the price is right:o) (Liberals please note - that was

humor) The E-Mail Newspaper is sent to you with love.

But indeed for this purpose I have raised you up,
that I may show My power in you, and that My
Name may be declared in all the earth. Ex 9:16

===============

EMAIL ATTACHMENTS / VIRUSES

Howdy will never send an email with attachments.

If you receive an e-mail that appears to be from

Howdy but has attachments, it was most likely

generated from a computer outside of 'T & H'

by a virus.

===============

'Thought & Humor' has been read in all 50 States,

230 Countries, 7 Continents, many Island Nations,
Oxford, Cambridge, every Ivy League School
& all major American Universities including UNC!!!

===============

Board of Advisors for 'Thought & Humor':

Did you know that 'Thought & Humor' has a distinguished Board of Advisors

that are designed to be a cross section demographically of our readership as far

as age, location, gender, marital status, education & occupation are concerned???

Bill J. - 60's - Fed. Government Employee

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Bob - 80's - FL - Semi - Retired Military Chaplan/Minister - D.D.

Brenda - 50's - TX - University Administor, Married

Caroline - 20's - FL - Married, Elementary School Teacher - H.B. July 22

Cindy - 40's - NC - 501(c)(3) Administrator - Married

Doug - 50's - TN - President of 501(c)(3) Corp, Married

Ellen - 20's - NJ - Registered Nurse - Married

Emily - 30's - TN - Banker, Married

Janet - 40's - MI - Married, Former Missionary to Arab Country

Jill - 50's - MN - Restaurant Owner, Married

John - 50's - Peru - Pastor, Married

Judith - 60's - TX - Retired Teacher

Katie - 20's - NC - Teacher, Married to UNC Med Student - H.B. July 28

Lee - 20's - GA - College Student

Les - 40's - Australia - Pilot

Lisa - 40's - TN - Secretary, Married

Marie - 60's - South Africa - Entrepreneur, Politician

Mamie - 30's - GA - Elementary Teacher

Patricia - 20's - MX - Entrepreneur, Politician

Phil - 50's WI - Disabled

Rob - 20's - NY - University Administor, Married

Ruth - 50's - CA - Real Estate, Involved in Spanish Ministry

Sarah - 20's - NC - UNC Student, Married

Tom - 40's - Middle East - Missionary

Shirl - 60's - CO - Finance Manager - Married to Minister

Teresa - 30's - NC - Mother

Wanda - 40's - Asia - Married - Communist Country

Advisory meetings are held weekly via the internet

and none receive monetary/pecuniary compensation

for their extensive/capacious/voluminous expertise.

===============

Dear Friends,

Goodbye for now with jocundness for both you

& your dynasty & an enkindling autumn pulchritude!!!

Your Amigo, Confrere & Sidekick,
Howdy
(probably spurious)

P.S. Can vegetarians eat animal crackers?

===============

How to UNSUBSCRIBE

& make poor Howdy Cry:

Go Here: http://write-howdy.blogspot.com/

Warning: Unsubscribing could restrict one's opportunities for

ascertaining uninterrupted existence for same's quintessence.

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

(You are receiving this e-mail because it has been reported to

us by a close associate of yours that you are in dire need of

jocularity/ludicrousness. If you feel that this is not the case

and that you might have received this missive/memorandum

in error, please disregard or send back to your professor/colleague.

Thank you!)

>>> Share the good news <<<
Please forward this newspaper to a friend!

But indeed for this purpose I have raised you up,
that I may show My power in you, and that My
Name may be declared in all the earth. Ex 9:16

Send instant messages to your online friends http://au.messenger.yahoo.com

#482

From: *** Professor Howdy *** <humorthought2u@...>
Date: Wed Nov 8, 2006 2:22 pm
Subject: 'Thought & Humor' - ...by Dr. Howdy - 8 new articles - 11.8.6

humorthought2u@...

'Thought & Humor'
...by Dr. Howdy - 8 new articles

Breaking News:
Saddam Has Escaped

Efficiency Lecture

An efficiency expert concluded his lecture with a note of caution.
"You don't want to try these techniques at home."

"Why not?" asked somebody from the audience.

"I watched my wife's routine at breakfast for years," the expert
explained.

"She made lots of trips between the refrigerator, stove, table and
cabinets, often carrying a single item at a time. One day I told her,
'Hon, why don't you try carrying several things at once?'"

"Did it save time?" the guy in the audience asked.

"Actually, yes," replied the expert. "It used to take her 20 minutes
to make breakfast. Now I do it in seven."

Executive Perks

Body On The Ninth Floor

A very large, old, building was being torn down in Chapel Hill, N.C.
to make room for a new dorm. While working on the 9th floor, two
construction workers found a skeleton in a small closet behind the
elevator shaft. They decided that they should call the police. When
the police arrived they directed them to the closet and showed them
the skeleton fully clothed and standing upright. They said, "This
could be Jimmy Hoffa or somebody really important."

Two days went by and the construction workers couldn't stand it any
more, they had to know who they had found. They called the police and
said, "We are the two guys who found the skeleton in the closet and
we want to know if it was Jimmy Hoffa or somebody important."

The police said, "It's not Jimmy Hoffa, but it was somebody kind of important."

"Well, who was it?"

"The 1956 UNC* National Hide-and-Seek Champion."

*Please see blog "comments" for additional pertinent information.

Grounded!!!

The Way To Your Father's Heart

As most children learn, there is an art to getting
what you want from a parent. And most kids
should get honorary degrees in psychology for
how skilled they become at doing it...

MORE!!!

LISTEN!!!

Cultivating Happiness

http://www.oomens-ict.nl/uploads/pics/img_computer_family_01.jpg

In the United States Declaration of Independence,
the "pursuit of happiness" is declared to be an inalienable
right. Regardless of whether or not this pursuit is a right,
we should ask the question of whether or not the pursuit
of happiness is ever truly successful...

MORE!!!

Our Blog Readers Snapshot

Num	Perc.	Country Name
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6	6.82%	Taiwan
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3	3.41%	Thailand
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2	2.27%	Mexico
2	2.27%	Germany
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2	2.27%	Unknown	-
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2	2.27%	Dominican Republic
1	1.14%	United Kingdom
1	1.14%	Turkey

from "'Thought & Humor'
...by Dr. Howdy"

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More MUSIC options

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Do you need some corny humor in your life???

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#483

From: "***Dr. Howdy***" <the_ludicrousness_prof@...>
Date: Thu Nov 9, 2006 3:13 pm
Subject: 'Thought & Humor' - 8 new articles - 11.9.6

the_ludicrousness_prof@...

'Thought & Humor' - 8 new articles

Crutch Cassidy & The Sunset Kid

MORE!!!

The Test -
Then The Lessons

Charles Dickens said it about the French Revolution,
"It was the best of times; it was the worst of times".

MORE!!!

LISTEN!!!

Discovered

I remember a time when it seemed quite obvious to me that
God was what I wanted. I understood what Pascal meant by
the God-shaped vacuum in my heart. And I knew Saint Augustine's
words to be true: our hearts are restless until they find their
rest in Him. But what I had grasped cognitively, I had not
grasped practically; the hole seemed only partially filled and
my heart was not at rest. I wanted to want God. I knew it
was God that I ultimately wanted, and yet I was sickened
with the suspicion that I had not found Him fully because
I didn't want Him enough. And so I wrestled: Do I really
believe? Do I fully trust in Christ's atonement? Am I truly
sorry for my sins? Am I seeking with all my heart? How
can I make myself want God more?

MORE!!!

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Num	Perc.	Country Name
35	35.71%	United States
14	14.29%	Ghana
11	11.22%	United Kingdom
8	8.16%	Egypt
4	4.08%	Turkey
3	3.06%	Slovakia
2	2.04%	Spain
2	2.04%	Switzerland
2	2.04%	Singapore
2	2.04%	Viet Nam
2	2.04%	Japan
2	2.04%	Australia
2	2.04%	Mozambique
2	2.04%	Italy
2	2.04%	Poland
1	1.02%	Sweden
1	1.02%	Romania
1	1.02%	Lebanon
1	1.02%	Denmark
1	1.02%	Germany

from "'Thought & Humor'"

Do you need some corny humor in your life???

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Leave a part of your 2006 in the Yahoo! Time Capsule. Contribute now!

#484

From: "*** Dr. Howdy ***" <professor_ridiculous@...>
Date: Thu Nov 9, 2006 5:00 pm
Subject: Personality Test Below ***Thought & Humor*** - November 9, 2006 A.D. - Forward to friends...

professor_ridiculous@...